Two women, who love American Idol, blog about the performers, judges, and guest artists and mince no words in the process.
Welcome
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Well, at Least Lieber and Stoller had a Good Night...
So, Auntee is cranky. Yes, it was a busy day and I don't like busy days much these days ( the first part was lovely at my meeting but then I had to sit in a doctors office for 2 hours) and yes, Mr. Auntee decided to make all sorts of plans which required my input and action on a very busy day which was a bit irritating, but I think a good Idol show would have brought me back to my being about as cheerful as Auntee is ever going to get. But I am still cranky.
So...here is my cranky take on what happened tonight.
Excuse me...I just took a break to place my cat Maxine in time out because she has Mr. Auntee disease tonight and won't leave me alone despite having the faucet running fresh water for her and 2 bowls of food.
I don't think there was a performance of the night tonight and really only 2 that came close. So, I will go by contestant in order of appearance.
James. Don't Stop Believing would be a perfect inspirational song for him if the Glee kids hadn't sung it to death for the past 3 or 4 years. It also helped to suck up to Randy...but it IS a good song. He did fine but I wasn't blown away by it. I'm not sure if its because James lacked energy singing it or if I am just sick of hearing the song. His second performance, LP #9 was somewhat better although he never did get his hips to move. My spirit was not moving on either song. The judges loved him as usual. Some critics say he is pitchy. I don't know pitchy until my ears hurt and he has not reached that point with me. So...I give him a B tonight.
Haley got Randy and JLo hate on her first song. And for the first time she talked back to the judges. Normally, I disapprove of it but this girl has been the judges punching bag from the beginning of the season. Normally she takes it in her stride but got a little *emo* (her words) tonight. However, my notes as she was singing were: *not an audience pleasing song*; *sort of a downer*; well sung*. Of course, I never got the Michael Jackson love even before he started sleeping with little boys. The only song of his I like is Billie Jean and only when David Cook sings it. I think Randy was over the top criticizing her vocals and I was glad Steven finally shut him down. Then, she comes out with *I Who Have Nothing* (which at that point was pretty appropo) and slays the judges with it to the point of another standing ovation. I thought it was good but not as good as House of the Rising Sun and its still a stupid song. I give her a B plus tonight with a star for talking back to the judges.
Scotty sings the patriotic song and it was one his fans have been asking for, so on the probably 2 days notice he had to come up with one, it was a good choice. The chorus was either ahead or behind him which ruined the performance for me and I thought it was a little subdued, even for Scotty. *Young Blood* is just another stupid song and he did with it what he could but I was not in love with that one either. So, he ties with James for a B.
Now...this will surprise you because you KNOW I think Lauren is a spoiled little brat and do NOT want her to win this thing. I thought she took the prize in the inspirational song portion of the show and that this was her best solo performance of the season. She has sort of milked the tornado victims to death (she is doing a charity concert for them the *going home* week whether she is in the final three or not...how clever is THAT?...her parents obviously hired a better publicist than even Pia hired). Her *Trouble*, while praised by the judges was I thought completely affected and I saw the Toddlers and Tiaras contestant again. If you don't want to sing *I'm evil*, then pick a song where those are not the only words in it. All I could hear by the end of it was *I'm awful, I'm awful, I'm awfuuuullllll*. Lets face it, she could have come out and farted her songs tonight and the judges would have praised her in order to avoid another *oooo....poor me...I'm in the bottom two* sobfest. I averaged her grades and gave her a B too.
So..despite Haley's horrible song choice on the first song, she narrowly comes in with the highest grade from me.
I cannot conclude without commenting on Gaga. One of Mr. Auntee's *let me just interrupt any peace you will have today* moments was coming in at the beginning of the show to tell me that I should skip Idol to see the Lady Gaga special (he thought he was being so cute). I informed him I didn't need to watch her on the special because she was going to be on Idol tonight. He retreated to the *time out* room. I still don't get her music and I really don't like the *let me look as outrageous as I possibly can* style, but I thought she was really nice to the contestants and offered some good advice to them so now I may reconsider my opinion of her.
And, as risque as her advice to Scotty may have been about the microphone, I have learned from reading elsewhere that she is absolutely right. Those microphones are designed to deliver the sound when held straight up...if they are tilted or held sideways, you lose part of the sound.
I'm not sure what will happen tomorrow. I want Lauren to go home but I'm pretty sure it will be Haley or even possibly James.
And FINALLY...I think there may be some new readers out there and if so, please feel free to register as a follower and to add your comments to our posts. We LOVE comments, even if they do not agree with us and the more we have the more entertaining the blog will be!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Final Jacob Jabs
So, here's some additional fodder to entertain you for awhile.
Need a laugh? It's Jimmy's fault:
http://www.tmz.com/2011/05/06/american-idol-jimmy-iovine-jacob-lusk-song-reject-elimination-song-chioce/?adid=featuredhp
But it's not just Jimmy. Nothing is ever Jacob's fault:
http://www.popeater.com/2011/04/15/idol-finalist-jacob-lusk-was-arrested-the-same-week-he-auditio/
I wonder whose fault it will be when he has to go back to work at the spa instead of to the recording studio? America's, I presume.
P.S. Isn't Mr. KK funny? You all should really have the pleasure of watching AI with him, because it's a riot.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Jacob, Your Mirror Just Broke
Guest Blogger: Mr. KK
Without further ado, worst to best from last night:
WORST (5): Jacob:
I don't understand how he hasn't been voted off yet and I am starting to worry that the longer he stays the more likely it is that he is going to win the whole thing. If that happens, I will never watch Idol again. For his first song, he chose "No Air" which is the only Jordin Sparks song that I actually like. (Auntee, you may have been joking but if you really don't know who she is, she won Idol a few years ago). "No Air" was clearly meant to be sung as a duet, but I think Jacob is probably used to doing things by himself that were meant to be done with others. His performance of the song was just terrible, probably because Jacob is about as contemporary as the carpenter jeans that I can still not let go of. On a side note, I am sofa king tired of J-Lo interrupting the other judges when they start to give negative comments that she doesn't agree with. I really wish Randy would have told her to shut up when she interrupted him. It makes me miss Simon even more because he certainly would have put her in her place. Back to Mr. Lusk...for his next "hit" he chooses "Love Hurts," a song made popular by Nazareth in the 70s that I really like as well. Love hurts...more like my head hurts after listening to him butcher this song.
(4) James:
Yes Auntee, you read that right. James was just not very good last night. I think people that liked his performances last night had Idol goggles on. What I mean is that if you heard these same performances of James' on the radio, you would immediately change the channel. He started off the night with a Jared Leto song that isn't that great of a song to begin with and James proceeded to sing it with tons of pitch problems and he even seemed off key at times. Of course the judges praised his performance, likely because they decided a long time ago that they wanted him to win this year. Look, I really think James appears to be a very genuine and nice man and I truly hope he has a good career. Having said that, he continued his terrible night by being pitchy on "Without You," a song that everyone loves. The judges even seemed to think he did a bad job but were afraid to say anything negative about him. Don't worry judges, AI voters are like mice following your directions as if you were the pied pipers.
(3) Scotty:
I thought his performance of "Gone" was fun but I didn't care too much for the song. He then offered an absolutely boring performance of "Always on My Mind." Don't get me wrong, he sang it well but it just seemed to be lacking emotion. I know that this was originally an Elvis song, but people from my generation only think of this as a Willie Nelson song. I've seen Willie perform that song live in person twice and there was never anything boring about it. Maybe it would have been better if Willie shared his herbs with Scotty before the performance.
(2) Lauren:
Her performance of "Flat on the Floor" was my favorite performance of hers all year. That song is fast-paced and very wordy and seems like a hard song to sing. I think she nailed it and blew away the two performances that had proceeded her. The judges loved it, especially Steven who always seems to look at Lauren in a creepy way. Another side note: We've been watching and enjoying NBC's "The Voice" and I encourage you to watch it. We need to have a vote as to the biggest perv judge between Steven Tyler and Cee-Lo. KK thinks Cee-Lo's tyrannosaurus rex arms would win that battle. Back to Lauren...Her performance of "Unchained Melody" didn't blow me away but I think she sang it very well. She didn't have any of the pitch problems that some of the other contestants had last night. I had a Righteous Brothers cassette when I was growing up (ya, that's right, a cassette tape) and I don't think anyone will ever sing that song as good as the brothers did. But I think Lauren did a very good job with it and really showed that she has a pretty dang good voice.
(1) Haley:
I think Haley has the best and the most unique voice left in this competition. Her initial performance of the unreleased Lady GaGa song was fantastic. I think Jimmy actually likes Haley a lot and wants her to win this. It certainly had to take some convincing from Jimmy for GaGa to agree to let Haley perform a song that GaGa hasn't yet released to the public. I think she did an amazing job on the song and I don't think the song itself was bad. Randy and J-Lo obviously disagreed. I think J-Lo is just jealous of the fact that Haley has a better voice than J-Lo herself (something that we likely won't be able to truly assess tonight on the results show given that J-Lo will almost certainly be lip singing). I think Randy just agreed with J-Lo so that she wouldn't interrupt him again. I also think it's hypocritical of the judges to bash Haley for singing an "unknown" song when other contestants did the same. I don't think James' Jared Leto song is topping the charts; and only country music fans have probably ever heard "Gone" that Scotty performed. It certainly has to be a sign of the apocalypse that Steven Tyler was the voice of reason when he told Haley that when someone can take a song that we don't know and make it work, that's a beautiful thing.
The only good thing about the negative criticism Haley got on her first song was that she was able to have a wonderful "FAH Q judges" moment when she just killed "House of the Rising Sun." It was definitely the best version of that song that I have ever heard.
Predictions:
Bottom three should be: Jacob, James, Scotty
Bottom three will be: we probably won't find out for sure but it will probably be Jacob, Haley, and Lauren
Going home: unfortunately, I think it's probably going to be Haley given the negative comments. Jacob, you are the weakest link...hopefully we get to say goodbye.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Now and Then? I Ask How and When?
Friday, April 29, 2011
Mr. Kissy
Crystal Bowersox looked gorgeous. Celebrity has done wonders for her. Her song was a little boring, maybe, a little too folksy for my taste. But she is so talented, and so fun to watch.
I think Bruno Mars' Lazy Song is stupid. Although, I woke up this morning singing "today I just don't feel like doing anything", and considered calling in sick to work to watch William and Kate.
I'm obviously hacked off that Jacob is still around. He's like Pukaletta - except less talented and worse dressed - in that he just won't GO AWAY. I honestly don't know who is voting for him, because I'm hard pressed to find anybody on the internet brave enough to post that they like him.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
jSomeone's Got a Spell on Him..
Ryan played games with us and didn't give us a bottom three. My guess is Scotty got the highest number of votes, despite the faux tension Ryan tried to create. I'm glad they called Haley safe first because her very existence is driving the St. Pia fan's insane. Speaking of Haley, I don't think there is any doubt now that she and Casey are an item and I think that is sweet. I liked how he sang the last few notes to her at the end. I also liked the positive way her performed his song. No tears from him!
It was great to see Crystal again but I wish she had sung a better song. I suppose it was appropriate for the setting, though..encouraging the Idols to just sing. I wish Ryan had found the time to talk with her and let her plug her album and appearances.
Bruno Mars was ok but the song lyrics were a little risque for the 7 pm time slot...hand down his pants, birthday suit, and great sex. But who am I kidding? Kids today know way too much.
No word yet on next week's theme but we are going to get another overwrought but boring performance from Jacob.
I liked the Medley and thought Lauren and Haley sounded great together. Also, Scotty proved he can sing something not country, but his detractors won't admit it.
Tomorrow is the Royal Wedding so I'm off to bed.
Bobbing Bow Ties
Best to Worst:
James Durbin for the WIN! Blew the other contestants away. BLEW them AWAY! From the 1st strum on his guitar, I had goosebumps. And they never left until he was done. Randy is right: James will win this whole thing if he keeps this up. Yes, James, I WILL still love you tomorrow!
Haley - Honestly, I think hers would be the only record I'd BUY. She's just so my style - her voice is so interesting, and just so good! I've never heard Beautiful, but I loved the way that Haley did it. I'm glad JLo commented that she had one of the best voices in the competition because Haley deserved some good praise tonight!
Scotty - I had him in the #1 slot until James and Haley performed, because I really liked how he took a little bit of the country out of You've Got a Friend, and just made it smooth. I also think he toned down the sideways microphone and eyebrow waggle, which helped.
Casey - I tell you why I like him: I had a boyfriend once that would take me out to this seedy jazz bar where the bartender had a heavy hand, the room was filled with smoke, and you couldn't even see the other patrons because they were hunkered down in their dark booths listening to incredible jazz. I can't help it - I like the piano, the trumpets, the hat.
Lauren - She's 16. When I was 16, I'd wake up at 4:30am and spend hours primping so I looked perfect for school. I had self-confidence issues, and I didn't have the entire country blogging about the size of my ass. Was her performance stellar? No. Did the judges throw her a bone when her voice cracked to save her from breaking down? Absolutely. But I felt a pang of sadness when I saw her tear up, because she's SIXTEEN and I've been a 16 year old girl.
Jacob - I'm convinced that his stylist goes home and night and tells her husband "you're not going to believe what I convinced this kid to wear today" and then they laugh and laugh. (I'm not even commenting on his singing. I'm done. It's just getting ridiculous here.)
Bottom three should be: Jacob, Lauren, Casey
Bottom three will be: Jacob, Casey, Haley
I worry that Haley might be going home this week. Which would be wrong.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Tapestry or Travesty
Friday, April 22, 2011
Boy You're An Alien
I know NONE of the words to the ET song, but I've been singing it since last night. At 3:00 am, feeding my 10-week old son, I caught myself humming about aliens and abductions. It's creeping me out that it's just. that. catchy.
The aliens dancing were weird. Katy Perry (who I generally think is gorgeous) looked weird. And Kanye (who I generally think is absolutely nutzo) looked normal. I'm convinced that after the Taylor Swift fiasco, Kanye is forcing restraint on himself, and last night he actually let Katy Perry take over the "I'm nutzo" spotlight. I liked the performance ... I hope my baby son does, too, over and over and over.
And they just don't make AI contestants like David Cook anymore do they? He's just in a league of his own.
Yeah, I have an album out, but let's talk about this charity for a cure for brain cancer and my Mom's dream to meet Stephen Tyler. David Cook, I love you.
Looking forward to next week, although I'm afraid Auntee will need to take the lead as I'm expecting to know very few of the songs.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Bada Bing Bada Boo Bada Bye Bye
I'm still a Rockstar (on the train to crazy-ville)
Ashton, Karen, Naima, Thia, Pia & Paul - Hysterical! The girls are so focused on strutting around in trampy leather outfits that they forget to sing the 1st verse on key. And then the doors open up and Paul comes stumbling out in his token stupid-flower-suit like a drunken monkey.
Pia's belting out her Mariah/Whitney/Celine notes,
Thia's giving the pagent faux-smile,
Naima is "yeah, yeahing" it up,
Ashton's wagging her diva head around, and
Karen's faux-flashing her Latina boobs by opening up her leather vest over and over.
All the while Paul is trying not to flail off the stage.
None of them care that they're not singing *with* each other, or that they're not singing on-key. "So What" was the funniest thing I've seen on Idol in a long time. I spent the entire performance cracking up.
What? They weren't trying to be funny? Oh, then it's just sad.
As for the contestants who really might be rockstars someday, Best to Worst:
James Durbin - What?!? KK likes James Durbin?!? Hell yeah I did. I'd even download that performance, which is saying something since I really am not a "rocker". Drummers were a bit weird, as was the dominatrix wand thing. But the vocals were incredible. Incredible!
Casey - I sort of wished he would've changed up the song a little more ala-David Cook, because he absolutely could have. But I'm a Maroon 5 fan, and I'm a Casey fan. And although I was a little creeped out when he was leaning into JLo, the kiss made me squeal with delight.
Haley - I think she looked absolutely gorgeous, for starters. And she did Adele justice with Rolling In The Deep, for sure. It *is* her niche, and she's found it, and she's good at it. I was annoyed that Randy had to struggle so hard to compliment her, but I'm glad she finally got the praise she deserved.
Scotty - Barely. After the clip of the contestants making fun of the microphone holding, it's ALL I could focus on. Frankly, it annoyed the hell out of me. As did the eyebrow waggle and side-mouth-singing. Swinging was boring. Dare I say "karoke". 'Course, he's not going anywhere.
Lauren Alana - Has really wised up with her song choices and her personality make over. Last week she pandered to St. Pia's and tweens with the Miley ballad, this week she tried to swing the massive country audience back her way. Even though it wasn't the best performance of hers, she's *competing* brilliantly.
Stefano - You're kidding, right? First the clip about him being a flirt and a ladies man had me in hysterics. And watching him strut around the stage like he was in some seedy club strip club trying to get the ladies to shove $1 into his too-tight pants, just put me over the top. I like Closer, it's a sexy song. Stefano was the opposite of sexy tonight bordering on crazy-town.
Jacob - Realized he might be slipping and pulled out the Dead-Father card. Well played. I loved that he screwed up, I loved that he got a bit of negative criticism. Those were the only non-boring parts of the performance.
Botton 3 will be: Haley, Casey, Stefano
Who *should* go home: Jacob (but he won't, because his dad is dead.)
Also, my boyfriend David Cook is coming back tonight and I could not BE more excited. He's the 1st Idol I truly loved. Swoon.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Opinion Deficit Disorder
Friday, April 15, 2011
Alternate career ...
Well done, America. All is right and just again.
Loved Scotty and Lauren again this week. Loved Haley and Casey even more. Didn't love the boys, but didn't expect to.
Auntee is hysterical, by the way. "How ya'll doin' tonight?" Bwahahaha! Awesome.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
How Y'all Doin' Tonight?
I don't get it ...
Best to Worst:
Lauren Alaina - I sort of might start pulling for her to win this thing (Auntee just died.) She sang the climb much better than Miley (which, I agree, isn't saying much), and she's getting SMART. She's pandering to the teens, she sung a ballad to pander to St. Pia's fans, she's even toned down the crazy judge-dancing, Ryan-flirting act and adopted (at least for now) a more mellow, grown-up personality. And she looked really pretty.
Haley - I like Blondie, I like Haley. I honestly don't understand how all three judges gave negative critiques of this. I thought she looked gorgeous (although I was a little worried the camera might show an up-the-dress shot on accident), and she sang/screamed "Call Me" just as well as she sang/screamed "Bennie" and "Come On".
Scotty - He didn't do anything new with the super well-known George Straight song, and it was totally predictable (I typed "predictable", but meant "boring"). I totally didn't get all of this "getting back to his roots" talk because he's sung country every. single. week. Hell, he found a country song during Elton John week! But, again, I was confused last night.
Casey, I guess - I totally didn't get this. I love jazz. I regularly frequented jazz bars when I lived in a city that had them. I love that Casey is an artist, and I really do think he's amazingly talented, but I didn't get Nature Boy and kept thinking of In The Air Tonight like Jimmy suggested. That said, I love his make-over. His hair and beard are shaping up nicely.
Stefano - I have to comment on his clothes because they're getting ridiculous. 1st it was the suit with the tennis shoes, now it's the too-small polo, too-small jeans, and tennis shoes. He could've done Boys 2 Men a real solid and wore a tie and sweater like they do. The. choppiest. version. of. End. Of. The. Road. ever. done. He might not have taken a breath between every word, but. it. seemed. like. it.
James Durbin - I don't get it. Admittedly, I don't like Heavy Metal. I can appreciate a good guitar solo, and am quite good at Guitar Hero, but that's as far as I go. I do like James, though, as a person. And I'd like to see him beat out most of the other contestants for that reason alone.
Paul - Last week I wanted Iggy Pop to flail into a wall or fall off the stage, this week I wanted Paul to flail into a wall or off the stage. The suit thing is getting trite, too. Honestly, I don't even think he's good looking anymore (except he does have the whitest smile ever made.) I've seen Old Time Rock and Roll done better by the drunk at the karaoke bar.
Jacob - The choir was good. And Jimmy reminded America that Jacob was a douche last week. So, that was fun.
Bottom 3 should be: Paul, Jacob, Stefano
Bottom 3 will be: Paul, Haley, Jacob
Random tangent: I believe that the judges are responsible for Pia's departure. And not because they "wasted" the save on Casey. But because they don't ever give negative critiques. Everybody gets the same glowing commentary every week. And without any subliminal guidance, America votes blindly.
What would Simon have said about Paul's flailing? We need a Simon to remind us that they are NOT, in fact, all good all of the time.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
I've Gotta Be ME...
Friday, April 8, 2011
More Sober Reflection on Shocking Results
Poor Stefano
I felt a little sorry for Stefano. They were clearly saying "you suck compared to her, you should be the one leaving"
But I also feel VERY sorry for Pia. It was wrong. And I'm betting the judges wish they would've saved the save for her.
All in all it was a really BAD night:
Constantine Something-or-rather butchered Unchained Melody.
Iggy Pop's scary, shirtless body flailed around the stage for what seemed like forever. I kept waiting for him to fall, or slam into a wall.
Jacob's stylist doesn't understand that overweigh people must NOT wear jeans that are too tight for them because of the muffin-top effect.
And my husband's girlfriend FINALLY wore a top where her boobs looked insane, and she gets voted off.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
BOOOOO!
Chris Medina's love story is NOT going to waste
www.tmz.com/2011/04/07/american-idol-rejects-contestants-rogue-concert-tour-chris-medina-tim-halperin-rob-bolin-juliana-recovery-fund-charity/
Tim Halperin's version of When A Man Loves A Woman puts Stefano's to shame:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbOQveFq7S8
I hope the tour does well, and that they raise lots of money for Juliana's care.
Creepy Wax Steven Tyler
I've been told I sound grumpy when I post (could it be the 4 hours of sleep at night?), but today is going to be a good day. Why? Because for the 1st time in YEARS of watching AI, I can honestly say that I really do enjoy ALL of the contestants. Last night was just a great show all around, and it's been fun to watch.
That said, somebody has to go. Worst to Best:
Jacob - I'm glad he changed songs because can you IMAGINE what those weird hip-thrusts would've looked like had he been singing Let's Get It On?!? Kris Allen killed Man In The Mirror, and I'll always compare it. It's a low-key song, and Jacob is ANYTHING BUT low key. If for no other reason, he needs to go home for his "if I'm in the bottom three, it's because America is afraid to look in the mirror" comment. WTF?
Paul - I still think he's hot, and quirky. And he might just be a little crazy, just like Johnny Cash was. But he's no Johnny Cash (who is probably rolling over in his grave right now.) For shame.
Stefano - I like his voice and he seems like a genuinely nice guy, but I can NOT get past the Pukaletta curse - Open Your Eyes, Kid!!! The judges said they felt emotion in his performance, but I felt the exact opposite. I actually wondered if he's ever loved a woman, because he was having trouble conveying it if he has.
Lauren - I get that the Jersey Shore poof is "in", but COME ON. Not cute. Natural Woman had some really good notes, but they couldn't make me forget about the 1st 1/2 of the song, which was just ... not good.
Scotty - I still love me some Scotty. But it felt karaoke to me. It felt like a little kid imitating his favorite singer.
Casey - I don't know why everybody is so down on the Growl, because I like it. I think he should Growl an entire song, it'd be awesome. I think the main reason why Casey is fantastic is because, like the judges said, he's a MUSICIAN. And even when he doesn't win AI (because he won't), I hope he goes on to have a career doing what he loves.
Pia - So, you sang up tempo ... give the girl a medal. Was it the earth shattering performance that the judges made it out to be? No. (I was really hoping to see a little more of the Tiny-Turner-Crazy in there - PIA is too straight to pull off that song.) Is she still REALLY. FRICKIN'. GOOD? Absolutely.
James Durbin - If you've been following me, you know I think he's overrated. But tonight's performance was nothing less than AMAZING. It's become a bit of a cliche, but I really did get goose bumps. I didn't even mind the ONE, controlled, scream at the end.
Haley - I've said it before, but my parents were hippies. So, I grew up listening to Janis Joplin and Piece of My Heart is the quintessential Joplin song, in my mind. Haley killed it, which is hard to do. I loved it.
Please, Please can Jacob go home?