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Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Is It A Man's World?

Simon doesn't think so. But BM does (I've shortened his acronym because he offended me less this week).

I will actually say BM's performance was number 3 on my top three tonight. I thought it started out a little slow (but better than that herky jerky stuff he did last week). I agree with Kara that for the first time I *get it*. His vocals were a lot less breathy and he wasn't just getting by on being a big old cuddly good-natured bear man. So..I will turn my malevolent eye elsewhere tonight.

While I am being positive, my second favorite performance was Lee DeWyze. But he needs to start singing on key. And he did look a little awkward without his guitar. I would guess he will be attractive to preppie women young and old. A little dangerous but not too much.

My favorite performance was little Alex Lambert. It was a sweet song from a sweet boy and without an overload of melisma. Unfortunately, he went for the falsetto I loathe so much. Fortunately, he hit it.

For the also rans:

I'm starting to pull for Andy Garcia. Will they just shut up already about the Paula song for pete's sake? He probably should have kept his guitar. His voice had a bit of a raspiness tonight which I am ambivalent about because it makes him more Gokeyesque to me. I'm trying to be fair. He no longer has my malevolent eye but it could come back to him one of these days.

Aaron Kelly. I agree with Simon that the song was not a good one for him to sing. Too old fashioned even though I love the song. I don't know the artist they mentioned he should emulate...Justin Beeber? I don't think Aaron knows him either. Who is he?

Jon Park is the Anoop of the season. All ballads all the time. (Didn't Anoop sing in an acapello group in college too?) You can't hate him but you cannot love him either.

Casey James. I really don't like that song of existential angst that everyone sings. OK, he doesn't have a TV and didn't know that its sung every season at about this stage of the competition. His guitar playing was the star of his performance. Vocals not so good and a stupid stupid song .

Tim Urban...well not the worst but 3rd from the worst tonight. He needs to tone down his tone or something. Its too harsh.

Toddrick (or as he is known on the Vote For the Worst site...*Fraudrick*)... I have never taken a cruise. I have this vision, however, of the Cruise Ship from Hell, where every nghtclub has a Toddrick entertaining you. You have a few drinks and are feeling mellow and you try to have a pleasant conversation with your companions. And he comes up to you with the microphone, dancing and singing stupid melisma and falsetto versions of Motown greats or rearranges Carrie Underwoods Jesus Takes the Wheel and you cannot leave the room fast enough. You search frantically for a bar on the ship that either has a jukebox or no music but everywhere you go..Toddrick is there....like Chuckie in the movie Childsplay! Finally, you stick a key in your ear. He is just plain creepy!

If you are lucky, you did not go the nightclub early enough to hear Toddrick's warm up act, Germaine. Who thinks Motown was only the precursor to Germaine the Great. What was that stupid onsie bit? You have to be remotely likable for that to work and Germaine...you really know how to (as Mr. Auntee would say) crap in your rice bowl. Insult the bands, insult the judges, insult your dad for not putting the heat up (did you PAY for the heating bills Germaine) and then invoke God. *What should I sing next week*. I think it took all of Simon's self-control not to respond. *Why don't you ask God about that?*. I do not mean to mock Germaine's faith. But my faith cannot separate belief from actions and Germaine acts to me like an asshat.

Which leads to my next proposition. Each week I am going to nominate an asshat of the week and encourage the blog followers to comment and add their own nominees. Germaine is my asshat nominee this week. I know it is premature as the women have not yet performed but I really cannot envision any of them surpassing Germaine.

I feel guilty because I mentioned Crystal Bowersox and her diabetes and am pretty sure her hospitalization was related to that condition. Its much more serious than adult onset diabetes and can kill quite easily. I'm sure the stress and schedule are not helping matters for her. I also feel guilty because the American Diabetes Association called asking for money this week and I told them no. I hope she is well enough to sing tomorrow.

No predictions tonight. I would say that Lee DeWyze, BM, Alex Lambert, Andy Garcia and Casey James are safe.