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Friday, March 30, 2012

Risky Business: Boobs and Jokes

Best to worst:

Nicki Minaj's boobs.  Gorgeous ... hypnotizing ... mesmerizing ... I could not look away.

Nicki Minaj's performance.  Awful, except for the boobs.

Also ... 

Scotty was back to perform a song about "sweet tea", "football" and "girls".  There was probably a verse or two about God and prayer, but I must've missed it.  Slam dunk, kid.  Congrats on your success.

Heejun's elimination surprised nobody.  The best part about it, though, was when Steven Tyler reminded him that he did it to himself.  "The music business will kick your ass."  Point taken.


What I found interesting about the evening were a few previously unspoken revelations -

Jimmy outwardly acknowledged the Jessica vs Hollie dynamic that everybody else, up to this point, was pretending to ignore.

Skylar has "experience"?  Apparently, at ages 7, 8, and 9 she did two national Broadway tours with Annie and LesMiserables.  (Research courtesy of MrKK's *other* favorite, almost as funny, AI blog:  Grantland AI Blog).

And Jimmy calls out the female tweens with cell phones for voting for cute guys - for the past 5 years - instead of girls.  "Girl power" huh?  We'll see. 


Thursday, March 29, 2012

Shock (Not)

Well, Auntee made an ass out of herself on the Idol boards today (but is not banned) when Ryan tweeted earlier today there would be a shocking elimination. Of course, my wishful thinking got the best of me and I predicted Jessica would be eliminated!  That would have been so cool!  But then they would have saved her.  So...I'm looking like an ass there. 

No, its not a shock HeJun went home tonight.  The shock was the reception he got from the judges last night which I guess made Ryan think Hejun was back on top or something.  Or else Ryan just lied about the *shocking elimination*for the ratings.  Take your pick.  Nice exit...he sang the song better tonight.  I was afraid they were going to save him but they did not.  I think the Idol boards would have exploded had they saved him or Deandre. 

I was sorry to see Skylar in the bottom 3, but the J's were not impressed with her last night so I guess they were not alone in their opinion.  I'm glad Jimmy is taking my opinions into account and suggested she sing a melodic song (a ballad) instead of the type she has been doing lately.  

I pretty much knew once Eric Benet appeared that Deandre was safe.  They wouldn't be so cruel as to have him meet his Idol and go home in the same night.  


Poor Hollie.  I think her days are numbered.  I keep hoping she will have a *moment* and thought she came close last night but I guess America agreed with Randy and Steven that her performance lacked something.  

As for Nicky Menage. I turned it off for most of the performance and got in on the end.  I guess she lip synced and kootchi kooed her boobs around.  Then she asked to be a guest judge and JLo shot her down.  You go JLo.  You are the Queen on the panel.

Everyone on the boards say that Idol doesn't want another country winner this year so they are discounting Skylar.  I'm thinking if Idol could get a country winner who goes platinum on the debut album every year they would be just fine with that.  Scotty was Scotty and I'm happy he is doing well.  He is back in school at least some of the time and pitching for his highschool  baseball team at least some of the time.

Next week is the 80s...which is KK's element! 

  

 



 

Cry me a river

Good news:  I didn't get sucked up by a tornado last night

Bad news:  Weather coverage forced me to YouTube WAY too many performances, and there were a LOT of tears. 

Best news:  Stevie Nicks is the mentor!!!  Can we replace Randy with her?  She's gorgeous, isn't she?  I'm in love with her, too, Jimmy.


Best to Worst:

Elise!  Yay, yay, yay!  She finally gets the pimp spot that she deserves, she kills the impossible Zepplin song Whole Lotta Love, she totally owns the stage, and she's wearing Steven Tyler's pants (she didn't get THOSE in the Hilfiger section of Macy's!)  She's been under-appreciated - even villianized - all season long.  Tonight she kicked ass.  It pained the judges to have to stand up for *gasp* a woman, but they knew they'd be fried if they didn't. 


Hollie - I, too, love Carrie Underwood (who doesn't?) and Jesus Take The Wheel makes me teary every single time.  Last night was no exception.  She looked gorgeous, the winter effects were wonderful, and she sounded beautiful!


Skylar - Does this girl EVER hold still?  She reminds me of my toddlers.  But how do you not love it?  She's just the cutest little thing ever!  I don't remember her singing Gunpowder and Lead before, and I thought it was awesome.  I will say, though, that it would be nice to see her calm down a bit.   


This is not a face you question.
Joshua - I didn't think this was his best performance, but it was still good.  Mariah Carey is one of *those* singers that contestants should just not sing (with the exception of David Cook, because he can do no wrong).  The bar is set so high before that 1st note, and Joshua did, in fact, start out rocky.  The gospel at the end brought it home for me, though.  Plus I LOVED his jacket!


Jessica Sanchez - Two words:  Over.  Sung.  Oversung, oversung, oversung.  Google Sweet Dreams by Beyonce.  Go ahead, I'll wait.  See how even Beyonce herself doesn't put a run on every. single. note?  I give her props, though, because I loved the slowed version. Way to make it "her own".


Phillip Phillips - He only partially groaned and winced through this performance.  Plus, I liked him with Elise and Colton on the trio, so I was swayed a bit.  I've never heard Still Raining, but Phillip's version was pretty okay.  But like Jessica's ballads and Skylar's bouncing around, Phillip Phillip's songs are all the same (but the judges would never point that out to him.)


Baby of the Week - After all of Randy's "Colton laid down the gauntlet" talk, I had to Google this.  Waste of 5 minutes.  BUT, genius strategic turn.  Last week he pulled the Christian card, this week he backed it up.  I'm a heathen.  Christian preaching annoys me.  I get twitchy at church and I only go on Easter and Christmas because MrKK makes me.  But the fact is, I'm in the minority.  There are a lot of Christian voters out there - and if he Tebows after his performance next week, he'll have this competition in the bag.  Well played Baby of the Week, well played. 


Hair - I like the hair cut!  That's about it, though.  I think his voice is probably pretty good.  If I knew about vibrato and falsetto, and appreciated the type of music where that fits in (what type of music is that, anyway?) I suppose I might like Deandre.  But I just don't. 


Heejun - Still a dick.  Elise disagrees with Jimmy's song choice during week 1 and is still trying to dig out of that hole weeks later.  Heejun is a dick to the cowboy during group week, fights with Jimmy every week, and all but asks America to vote him out - yet this week he sings an ok-sounding song and all is forgiven.  MrKK and Jimmy Iovine might be softies, Heejun, but I don't forget.  And I hold grudges.


Bottom 3:  Heejun, Hair, Hollie


Going home:  Hair

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Whole Lotta Love Standing By Your Man

What a strange show tonight.  Five standing ovations.  Four of them for men. There are only 5 men left in the competition!  And they wonder why women keep dropping like flies. 

First, I must say that overall this was the best live performance yet as far as I was concerned.  It does help to let the kids sing what they love.  Well, it helps most of them.

But, I'm not all Lollipops and Rainbows tonight.  I'm seriously thinking the judges have jumped the shark.  They just couldn't love the men enough tonight.  The women...ho hum...even for Little Miss Perfect, Jessica Sanchez.

The show starts off laying a big egg with a picture of Jimmy with Stevie Nicks in their heyday.  Yes, they used to date and now its nice they are *good friends*.  The audience just sat there on the first photo and barely reacted to the second even with an arrow pointing to Jimmy when he had Colton hair.  Awkward.  

Then Tommy comes on and lectures the Idols about finding *their own style* in the Tommy Hilfiger section of Macys.  Naturally, they all come out looking alike.    

Colton starts the performance part of the show with a *Worship Song* by Lifehouse called Everything (I had to cheat and look up the name of it).  I have never heard of Lifehouse and thought it was *Lighthouse* until I looked again.  (*Lighthouse* made no sense when I googled it as a band name and wasted 10 minutes or more trying to figure out why he was singing a song from a 70's Canadian band or a German Punk Rock band...neither of which seemed particularly inclined to sing about God.)  Stevie Nicks thought the song was about a woman.  Major disconnect there between Stevie and Colton although Stevie does like his hair.  I thought it was fine, noticed the *squeak* in his voice some on the Idol fan boards are referring to,  and listened as Colton gave witness. I must say, the song was not very catchy but it probably wasn't intended to be.   The judges think he is great...he is *in it to win it* per Randy but he doesn't get a standing O.  

Skylar loves Miranda Lambert and takes on a song she has sung before, Gunpowder and Lead.  I thought she did a good job of *telling the story* and liked her performance this week better than last.  She is about the only contestant who has not done a ballad and I wish that she would.  She didn't get a standing O either but the judges were complimentary even though Steven keeps forgetting where she is from.  Last week it was Houston, this week its Galveston...oh well.  

HeJun is doing penance this week after mocking the process last week.  He abandons his paternal roots (Normund Gentle), goes back to balladeering (Thia Megia), and sings Donny Hathaway's A Song For You.  I find it hard to believe that Donny Hathaway is HeJun's Idol...he would have sung any ballad they put in front of him or even Randy's phonebook to get back into the judge's good graces.  Jimmy is glad HeJun is now taking things seriously, Stevie psychoanalyzes him to convince us he is not a jerk, and HeJun comes out and tries to emote.  He sounds like he needs an inhaler, is pitchy, and his final note is second only to Danny Gokey's scream in Dream On for Idol awfulness.  The judges are standing up clapping.  I'm thinking HOLY BALLS!  What is going on here?  The judges are clearly rewarding him for not being an ass this week even though he stunk up the stage.  Just like the prodigal son, he gets the feast and the others get the leftovers.  I have always hated that parable.  It makes no sense to me.  The prodigal son should not be praised for doing what he is supposed to do in the first place. I blame it on Dr. Spock. 

Little Hollie takes on Carrie Underwood which both Randy and Steven think is a mistake.  Randy basically pans her...says it was *pitchy* (like HeJun wasn't? Oh yeah...Randy said HeJun wasn't perfect but it doesn't matter because...) and beats that drum to death.  JLo says it is her best performance and I agree with JLo. Steven doesn't like the song for her.  Evidently TPTB (the Powers That Be) have decided its time for her to go.  

Deandre sings Eric Benet's Sometimes I Cry.  I'm not familiar with this song but I'm crying in pain at the falsetto.  Stop. It. Now.  No...no...the judges LOVE the falsetto (called falshitto by VFTW guys) and give him a Standing O.  Now I'm going WTF?  Deandre is back according to Randy.  I think he is a cute, sweet, kid, but there is no way that Tiny Tim imitation deserved a Standing O.  Even if you like falsetto it doesn't deserve a standing O.  Bizzaro world is coming off my TV screen right now. 

Jessica Sanchez sings a Beyonce song (and I have no problem believing Beyonce is her Idol since she imitates her all the darn time) Sweet Dreams.  This girl is going to beat the Dream theme harder than Danny Gokey beat his dead wife.  I thought it was fine but not memorable.  The judges did too, but were surprisingly reserved and she doesn't get a Standing O.  As much as I don't like her, that performance was heads and tails above HeJun and Deandre and I'm beginning to think that the only thing wrong with it for the judges is Jessica's gender. We learn Jessica has an alter ego who she channelled tonight for her performance.  The alter ego likes to sing ballads. Mmmhmm.

Ok, here  comes Phillips doing a Johnny Lang (someone I don't know) song called *Still Rainin*.  Stevie is in love with him and Jimmy points out he looks like Lindsay Buckinham.  I guess it was a good performance.  It gets a Standing O too.  (Well after they gave HeJun and Deandre one for the crapfest they served up...what are they gonna do when their favorite actually does a decent job?).  He didn't seem to be hunched over so much tonight so maybe his potty problems are in remission.  

When I heard that Joshua was going to do Mariah Carey I was thinking...I'm not sure you want to be doing some feminine song here Joshua because you are rather *ambiguous*.  Well, it is not really Mariah Carey, it is Harry Nilsson, someone I forget that I love until I hear one of his songs and then I'm in love again.  I didn't take too many notes while he sang because I was involved in the performance.  Now THAT deserved a standing ovation.  Should have been the FIRST of the night and not the fourth. Update:  I guess I am about the only person in the world who liked this performance (other than the judges) as it was universally panned on the Idol boards.  But, at least it was better than this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQt-h753jHI

Finally, Elise gets the Pimp Spot. No one thought they would ever give that slot to her and  no one thought she could sing this song by Led Zeppelin.  She evidently nails it on the first take with Stevie and Jimmy because Stevie has found a new best friend and they sing a Fleetwood Mac song together.  Stevie thinks Elise is awesome and so do I.  I, frankly, couldn't believe what she did with that song.  Finally, one of the ladies gets a Standing O but by this time it has sort of lost its power.  I mean really...if HeJun set the bar...

The trios were a nice way to use up the extra half hour of time Fox has because the 1/2 hour sitcom they were going to air in that slot bombed or they shelved it or something.  I like it when they do trios and duets and the pressure is off of them.  I liked the Fleetwood Mac tribute the best.  I'm not a big fan of Madonna and I really have never liked Michael Jackson but I thought they all did a nice job.  I was a little surpised that Skylar overshadowed both Hollie and Jessica on the Madonna trio.  Jessica was probably bummed out because she didn't get a standing ovation and to tell you the truth...I don't blame her. 

I voted for the first time tonight...for Elise.

The judges need to do some serious soul-searching because I think they did a HeJun tonight...not taking this seriously. I can only conclude that TPTB want HeJun and Deandre around a little longer so told the judges to praise them for their dreck performances.

I sincerely hope HeJun and Deandre are in the bottom 2.  One of them should go home.  If they save Deandre I will scream in falshitto!    


    




     

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Stevie Nicks To Mentor American Idol Next Week!

This should be good! I've read she and Iovine used to date but I gather it was more on his side than hers.  Hope she performs and shows a couple of them how its supposed to be done. 

As for the *I just wanna be me* performers who are blase about their image...I read that Stevie...whose image is iconic...worked for a year with a costume designer to develop her signature look.  Maybe some of these people should listen to Tommy better next week. 

Friday, March 23, 2012

Everything I think is wrong anyways ...

I apologize for not blogging my thoughts about Billy Joel week before last night's elimination.  You'll be relieved, though, when you find out that my opinions were/are apparently totally backwards and opposite of the rest of America's.  

For example:  
I LOVED Erika's makeover!!  I thought she looked edgy, and trendy.  
I also got a little teary at Baby-Of-The-Week's Piano Man, it was absolutely beautiful.  
I thought Hollie looked ridiculous in her pants suit.

So, maybe it's better that my thoughts on Billy Joel week were left unsaid, seeing as how I've completely gone off my rocker.

Last night -  

Unsurprisingly, Erika gets voted off.  Unsurprisingly, the judges save the save. 

Unsurprisingly, Lana Del Ray sucked.

Unsurprisingly, Haley was gorgeous and awesome.  (I will agree that the cage was weird.)  I always said I'd buy her music, and true to my word, I'll download that song from iTunes.  It was lovely, and I hope it's indicative of a long, successful career for her. 

On another note - Heejun has come full circle for me.  Remember during group week when I called him a dick?  It may have been edited out for the past few weeks, but he's still a dick.

Erika, who actually WANTS a singing career, is on her way out the door.  And Heejun (who is wearing the same track pants that MrKK SLEEPS IN), admits that he "doesn't want to be a star" and rolls his eyes at Jimmy Iovine when confronted with the fact that AI is dishing out a lot of money to make these kids celebrities.  Even JLo is getting annoyed with 'Tude, and tries to appeal to him with a "think of the kids" line.

Look, he doesn't want to be here.  He was obviously disappointed that he wasn't voted off last night.  He has no respect for the individuals who are actually TRYING to make a career or this, and he's blatently mocking them.  Let's give the kid what he deserves, huh? 

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Mediocrity AKA Lana Del Ray and Final 9

Well, its not like we didn't see it coming but I was saddened by Erika Van Peldt's departure tonight.  We are left with a mediocre falsetto guy with big hair, 2 battling Diva Wannabees one of whom thinks the world of herself, a country girl with grit who needs to up her game, a rich emo kid who thinks he's edgy because he has a streak in his hair, a shucker with a guitar and a goat vibrato (a term used by the Vote For the Worst Guys which I have stolen), a gospel singer who hits and misses, a smoky voiced woman who everyone loves to hate, and Norman Gentle's and Thia Megia's love child.

When Elise is eliminated the only person I will care to see or hear perform is Skyler and she better do something interesting soon because Jimmy is right, she risks flatlining or going backwards.

But, I'm not bitter. 

Talk about mediocre...Lana Del Rey, (real name Lizze Grant) Interscope's latest pre-fabbed *indie pop* sensation...was underwhelming tonight.  And, that was her best song.  It is supposed to be about the joys of a wonderful love affair but all I could hear was whining. She wasn't quite as dreadful as she was during her Saturday Night Live appearance (if you want to bother, you can see it on YouTube) but she is not  the caliber Adele or Amy Winehouse or Gaga or any other indie sensation she is trying to emulate.  You may disagree. May I respectfully suggest, you are wrong. I have no idea how an unknown artist who has not toured manages to get her record as #1 in 20 countries on the first day of its release but I'm thinking Interscope went in and bought up all the copies in Uzbekistan and other places where they sell for ten cents a piece...or they just flat bribed some government official to force it on the masses.  It probably doesn't hurt that her father, Rob Grant, *is President and CEO of Web Media Properties which controls a global network of over 8000 highly focused vertical domain channels providing advertisers with laser targeting and conversion rates far exceeding traditional ad networks.* He has been *supporting* her career.  She was scheduled to tour in the US but the tour has been postponed (coincidentally after the disastrous SNL performance).

In contrast, Haley debuted her single Free and I thought was amazing although I could have done without the stupid cage.  Of course for me, the perfect Haley performance is her on stage alone with a microphone and one spotlight and the piano.  Free is already #32 on I-tunes.  Good for her.  She left Lana Del Papa's Money in the dust! 

So, we lose a pretty good contestant and retain Deandre and HeJun.  Sad for me.  

I don't even want to think about next week.

Oh..I guess Billy Joel stayed alert long enough to witness Jessica the Great sing his Dream song and thought it was good or something. PHFTTT!         


  

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Oh Lord Its Hard To Be Humble...Jessica Sanchez Scores Again

Well, we have another standing ovation for our vision of perfection, Jessica Sanchez, as she sings Every Body Has A Dream to praise and acclaim by the universe.  I have a dream.  I have a dream I won't have to hear her oversing, overtrick, overrun, over vibrato and over melisma ever again.  I think my dream will die on the vine.  She gets the girl's *dream* spot for the 3rd time this season (also known as the pimp spot).  Idol is telling you that she is not going and you just better get used to it.

Tonight's theme was the songbook of Billy Joel and nine other people were lucky enough to sing back up for Jessica tonight.  If Billy is not already passed out for the night,  I'm sure he is amazed and  grateful that Jessica turned out to be the  one he wrote that Dream song for lo those many years ago.  It is probably blasphemy for me to talk about anything but that moment in time where the song and the singer came together but I will risk the Idol god's wrath and talk about those 9 other people who were allowed on the stage tonight.  

Diandre (aka Hair) is up first and switched to an uptempo song, Only The Good Die Young,  after several weeks of singing ballads.  In the mentoring session, Jimmy talks about trying to make it with Catholic girls and Diddy talks about Christie Brinkley.  All of this goes *whoosh* over Deandre's head of silky hair.  Confession, I am beginning to like Deandre personally even though I'm not a fan of his singing.  He seems like a sweet kid.  As he goes upbeat he pops up and down a lot and the performance was not a disaster but certainly nothing anyone will remember tomorrow. I barely remember it now.

Up next is Erika Van Peldt who I like a lot.  Based on last weeks votes, she will be the next one to go home unless she has a really wow moment.  She must have flipped Nigel Lythgoe off or something because she is not only given a death spot...they give her (the most beautiful contestant in the contest)  a horrendous makeover so she looks like an ugly female impersonator.  The Vote For The Worst guys called her new look a cross between Rosie O'Donnell and KD Lang.   I guess she thought she should take some image risks since Idol has been determined to keep her out of the spotlight by putting her in the death spot 3 weeks in a row but for crying out LOUD.  Ok, her hair needed a trim.  But, you do not make blonde girls blue/black brunettes.  They just look like harsh old women in a bingo parlor with helmet head.   I was so appalled at how ugly they made her look I could barely focus on her performance.  She picked a good song, and she sang it well, but I don't think it  will make any difference.  Ironically, since they made her give up her goldielocks, they give her the goldielocks judging treatment.  Last week she oversang, the week before that she undersang, this week she undersang again.  They. Hate. Her.  There is no other explanation. 

Joshua, who has incensed the Jessica lovers on Idol boards because he got better reviews that she did last week, is put back in his proper place by the judges. They were not feeling it from him tonight.  I thought he had a good song choice and don't understand why he couldn't relate to it.  I thought he made it his own but the choir coming in at the end (which the judges loved) I thought was unnecessary.  Steven says he had never heard that song before.  Say WHAAA? Its hard to believe until you realize that Steven was in a drug induced black out for most of the 80s and 90s.

Up next is Skylar, who is one of my favorites but when I heard she was going to do a country twist on Billy Joel, I had visions of Kristy Lee Cook and the Eight Days A Week debacle.  It was not a debacle but won't win her any new fans.  I don't think she needs any new fans at this point so she will be safe.

Elise must have seen Erika come home from the beauty parlor because she was having NONE of the advice she was given and thank goodness for that.  She sings Vienna which I was not familiar with but which I was loving by the end of the song.  I like this girl more and more and in my opinion, THIS was the performance of the night and should have gone last.  Since she didn't take their advice and sing a song totally unsuited for her or wear the clothes Tommy selected, she gets stuck in the middle where she won't be remembered very well.  

Up next is Phillips and he is not buying the mentoring/styling either.  He shucks his way through both sessions making them think he is listening to them and just does what he wants to do with Movin Out.  He still looks to me like he is in some sort of physical pain relating to his potty problems when he performs, but I must admit this was the first performance of his that made me see what all the fuss is about. I'm not spending any time voting for him though. 

Poor Hollie.  I must be tone deaf as I didn't hear the pitchiness they all complained about.  I didn't like her little spangled midriff top...but I agree she needs to dress her age. I'm just not sure the hootchie cootchie look is *her*.  I actually thought this was the first of her performances where I could detect she was feeling the song but the judges weren't buying it.  

And oh boy...HeJun REALLY cannot take criticism well, can he?  He is still feeling sorry for himself after last week and does My Life.  Nice that he changed to uptempo from a ballad but he pretty much sang this as a *kiss my ass* to the judges. Steven was not amused.  I thought it was funny but it was basically HeJun does Norman Gentle.  It did make me smile.  He bought himself a couple more weeks with that one I suppose...not because it was good or he deserves a couple more weeks...he is clearly the least talented one left...but because his fans will lap it up.  

Diddy and Jimmy are falling out of their chairs praising Jessica during the mentoring session although they do warn her not to oversing the song.  She oversings it anyway.  Thats OK by everyone.  I thought she was flat but I thought Hollie was on pitch.  Jessica is back where she belongs and lapping it up like a cat with cream.  

I love the song Piano Man (primarily because I think the best place to be is in a piano bar with gin getting all sentimental and weepy over old songs) and everyone knew Colton was going to sing it.  I have been critical of Colton but I did love his performance tonight. He has come out this week as a Christian and says he wants to do Christian Rock after this is over.  So did Danny Gokey but he went to Nashville instead..maybe Christian Rock didn't want Danny? (Danny's Nashville recording contract has been cancelled).  Colton isn't going anywhere for a long time.

So...I'm afraid this is going to be one long season for me.

Tomorrow Haley performs her new song live which I have heard and it is awesome and Lana Del Rey performs via pre-recorded taping.  I didn't know much about LDR until today when I youtubed her.  She gave a horrible live performance on SNL a month or so ago and has been the subject of much ridicule since.  I think she was picked up by Interscope as their answer to Amy Winehouse and Adele as she pretty much imitates one in looks and the other in song subjects.  I'm not sure what I think of her.  I think she might be a fake but I could be wrong.  We will see how she does tomorrow night.           

Monday, March 19, 2012

Unfaithful

I must confess that I have strayed from Idol and taken up with the Voice (but only on the side and it means nothing and is only about the music).  I think that Voice has, generally speaking, a much  larger talent pool than Idol and wonder where they came from and why Idol didn't manage to attract them.  Someone enlighten me on how these people are chosen to audition.  I know the age restrictions are lifted which is a good thing and (at least at first), the image restrictions are lifted.  I'm not sure I'm a fan of the *battle* format because there are a lot of good ones going home.

But, my REAL question, and the reason for this post is:  Is Christina Aguilera ever going to change her outfit?  I'm getting pretty tired of that black cow patty on her head and I realize plunging necklines with two-sided tape to keep the nips from showing are all the rage but come one...give us some variety here!  Sure, all of the battles were probably  taped on the same day but so are the Jeopardy shows for a week and somehow the librarian from Oshkosh manages an outfit change for each taping on a much smaller clothing budget than the Voice presumably has for its superstar! 

That is my biggest complaint about my new interest.

Update:  When I wrote the above I had only seen the 2nd half of tonight's show (I had to watch House).  Then I read the buzz about the Erin/Shield's Brother's Performance and watched it.  WTH?  That Erin is right up there with Bikini Girl and Tatiana on my all time contestants I loathe list!  And she WON!  CeeLo was not thinking with his ears.   

Please send us money!

I'm just going to call B.S. on this whole story ...


Phillip Phillips' family can't afford to fly to see him on AI.  So, the whole town is chipping in.

You're telling me that as much camera time as AI gave Pitcher Migraine and Lauren Alaina's mom, Nigel won't pony up $3,000 to fly out the-chosen-one's family?

Especially in light of all of these medical emergencies the kid is dealing with?

Two words:  sympathy. vote.

Poor Phillip Phillip's Family 


 

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Theme Update

The theme for this week is Billy Joel.  I can only imagine what some of them will do with this one! 

Friday, March 16, 2012

Pitcher Migraine = Lauren Alaina's Mama

These two parents have some weird draw that makes the cameraperson forget the CHILD is actually performing and spend entirely too much time zooming in on the adult.  

I know I talked bad about Shannon from the beginning, and her "sing for your life" performance showed that she really did deserve to go, but she seems like a nice girl.  $100 says she gets a modeling or TV gig out of this.

Daughtry was there.  Demi Lovato was there.  

On another note - You can't really call yourself a blogger until somebody has called you insecure and told you to grow up.  

Auntee and I LOVE to read your comments!  If you disagree with us, we (unlike those *other* Idol boards - where Auntee will no longer be welcome in a few short weeks) do respect others' opinions.  

So comment away!  

(It's only 80% likely that we'll make fun of your comments at a later date.)

 

Thursday, March 15, 2012

I Told You So

Well, KK told us so.  She nailed the bottom three.  I'm glad she was wrong about Erika, but I must say, I was a little sad to see Migraine go.  I know I didn't like her from the get go but she has worn me down with her sweet ways and I figured out tonight, as she was singing her swan song, that the person in the Migraine family I really don't like is her mother...who is always singing along with Shannon whenever she sings.   By rights, it should have been HeJun and Hair sitting on the bottom 3 stools with her and one of them should have gone home. 

The judges actually might have saved Elise, which would have brought on all sorts of hatred on the boards as she has been targeted by the *attitude police* for not being overjoyed when she is placed in the bottom three and not hugging the winner when she is named a potential loser.

Shannon was just in over her head.  Pushy parents just couldn't wait another year or two for her to mature.  

Readers will not be surprised that I am persona non grata to some of the posters on the AI forum boards.  Seems tee70 called Colton's performance a bs, fake, self-indulgent pile of doo doo.  This very astute critique engendered an indignant response about my level of maturity (I guess I should have said feces or excrement instead) and a lecture from another poster on respecting other's opinions.  I'm wondering why he didn't respect MY opinion.  I would have responded but its a little early in the season for me to be banned...I'm sure it will happen sooner or later (it never fails).

Have no idea what the theme is next week, but they better get some life in this show.  For the most part, the last 2 weeks have been snooze-fests with the occasional rude awakening.

Idol gossip:  It looks like HeJun and Phillip(s) are buddies.  

  

 


And Idol has sucked me right back in ...

Best to Worst:

Jermaine's speaking voice.  It's higher than mine!  And he has a lisp!  Funniest criminal ever.  Ba Bye.

Joshua!!  He was amazing from the minute he sucked the brain out of the crawfish, to calling his Mama "maam", to wanting to sing in church but being too misbehaved, to Oh. My. God. When a Man Loves a Woman just turned me into a big pile of mush.  Were those tears in his eyes?!?  There were in my eyes, for sure.  I'm with JLo, "I can't stop saying Wow".

Hollie - I don't know why I doubted a girl that might weigh all of 80 lbs might not belt Celine's Power of Love, and we're all wondering where in the hell she keeps that gumption, but she's ridiculous.  And I'll just say it, she's better than Jessica.  Plus, how adorable was it when her Dad broke down and then blamed the sun?

Elise - Even Will.I.Am wanted a smile out of her.  Look, Elise, I love your voice.  I think you're unique and awesome.  I love your song choice of Lets Stay Together, and you were great.  The attitude thing might not stand in the way of an actual career in music, but when you're pining for the votes of American tweens, you need to drop it.  

Skylar Laine - Was a headbanging baby?  Awesome!  This wasn't my favorite performance of hers, but I love that she stuck to her country guns and opted for Bonnie Raitt instead of Coolio (Coolio, Will.I.Am? Really?) She's adorable, her parents are adorable.  Now, Skylar, get back in my pocket where you belong.

Here's a Tie between Heejun and Erika -

I give Erika the edge because she, as a baby, reminds me (as Auntee hinted) of another LOUD toddler I know and love - Heaven is a beautiful song.  Is it weird that I totally understood and agreed with everything Stephen Tyler said?  She put in too much.  Too many runs, too much vibrato, too many extra notes.  She didn't butcher it, by any means, but I think she's in trouble this week.  

Heejun's mother is awesome - "I think he gets his humor from me".  They seem like the kind of family that I'd like to hang out with, because they're just sort of silly and fun.  Heejun's Right Here Waiting fell right into his pattern of singing corny 80's ballads.  (Note: I find it interesting that he mentioned how his accent is a struggle, and I wonder if it's gotten more and more noticeable to others, like it has for me?)

Jessica Sanchez - Was advised by her stage parents to do "up beat" as to not fall into the "ballad trap" (which leads to untimely demises ala Pia)  She claims the song list was tiny (I doubt her parents even let her see the list), and the judges poo-pooed that later in the show by noting there's probably 20,000 songs/year to choose from. 

Migraine - She didn't slaughter One Sweet Day, but I owned that casette tape, played it on repeat, wanted to BE Mariah, and wanted to MARRY Boys II Men, and she didn't do it justice either.  Plus, how many times do we have to be reminded that her Dad was a pitcher?  Yawn. 

Phillip Phillips - Was apparently named that on purpose.  I thought maybe he'd been adopted or something.  Mean.  I guess his stones explain why it looks like he's in pain when he's singing?  Hard to Handle, was in deed.

Colton Dixson - Everybody else is all over this kid's nuts (even Daughtry, apparently.  shame on you, Daughtry.)  He's down this low for 2 reasons: (1) his song sucked, and (2) BABY OF THE WEEK?!?  Not only did he steal his sister's Idol audition, he probably stole her Idol spot, he was the star pitcher, and he was born baby of the week.  His poor sister can never compete with baby of the week.

Hair - I actually think Endless Love was a better choice than Lion King's Can You Feel the Love.  But both would've been filled with lots of annoying vibrato and hair tossing.  Plus, the suit alone put him at the bottom. 

 
Bottom 3:  Shannon, Erika, and Elise

Going home:  Erika

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

*Somewhere Out There....

beneath the Philly sky , the cops are waiting for me, as I say goodbye.* I must mention that Mr. Auntee, who is from Philly, was not at all surprised to learn that Jermaine was from his neck of the woods. 

Talk about drama!  Jermaine turns out to be a garden variety thug and not the Gentle Giant.  I doubt we will ever know the real reason Idol decided to seek the *cooperation of law enforcement* which led to Jermaine's untimely exit.  Some gossip sites are saying he was acting aggressive behind the scenes, yelling at wardrobe people, and losing his temper.  Or maybe it was the conflicting stories he and his long lost father were putting forth in their press battle for public sympathy.  We certainly saw a small bit of entitlement on his part last week but I must admit I was not as astute as KK and chalked that all up to nerves on his part.  

I wasn't too happy with how Idol handled the situation  tonight.  There was no need   to build the *suspense* for the audience for 3/4 of the show.  It doesn't really bother me that he was publicly humiliated but I think making it a part of the show was unfair to the other contestants.   Still.. showing him sing *Somewhere Out There* was pricelessly ironic. 


As for the actual show tonight, for me it was just *meh* with 2 or 3 exceptions.  


Since Phillip Phillips, the *original* is favored so highly, they give him the poop spot figuring he will be safe.  We get a bid for sympathy due to his kidney stones and hear that he almost died as an infant because part of his bowel was dead.  Entirely too much information about his elimination processes past and present as far as I'm concerned, even if this is the poop spot performance.  I don't know what song he sang.  It sounded like every other performance of his and every other growly male singer I've heard. Nice kid, I'm sorry he has potty problems, but he is not one to get my vote. 

Up next is Jessica, our little Miss Perfect, who I'm sure you were surprised to learn, was a Diva as a baby.  She makes an odd choice of *Turn the Beat Around* and all I can think of is the margarine commercial and *Turn the Tub Around*.  She does a good job with it if you like that sort of thing although that little *ready for it* in the middle was cheese on toast.  She didn't get a standing ovation which appeared to surprise her.  And the judges did not slobber on her as usual.  She explained that there were not a lot of songs to choose from in 1995 (well in her mind, probably not a lot of songs that were worthy of her voice).  My guess is that she chose an upbeat song thinking it was going to show the world that *I can sing the phonebook yoo dawg* and it backfired. 

HeJun is likeable as usual but had a perfectly dreadful performance of *Right Here Waiting For You* (or whatever the song title is).  Good song, but he blew it.  I think he is safe because he has lots of fans who love him for his personality and really don't care if he can sing well or not. 

Elise is out for redemption and nails her song (why did I not write down all the song titles?).  I was caught up in her performance and wishing her well as she took a lot of abuse on the American Idol Fan Boards for having a *bad attitude* last week.  She did great I thought but it may be too late.  

Diandre got bad reviews for his song (another one I cannot remember the name of) but I actually liked him better tonight than at any other time except he had to ruin it by adding that stupid falsetto at the end. Surprisingly, the judges were hard on him too tonight. 

Up next is Migraine and I told you she would sing about love and hope this week and redeem herself.  I didn't think her vocals were all that great but there was love and hope and for good measure heaven involved and the judges seemed to want to give her a pass.  We note that she was a cute little girl and Daddy has to make sure we know he was *somebody* once so we get pictures of him pitching. 

Colton, of course, chooses an obscure song filled with emo.   We learn that Daughtry is a fan so now Colton is a rocker and not an emo piano singer.  The little girls will go crazy as they imagine they can cure the broken heart he sang about.  Steven saw through the bs, bless his heart and gave him a scathing review with a look of disgust on his face.  Steven has figured out this guy is a poser.  Randy and JLo are still in love with him. 

Erika lets loose on her song and follows Jimmy's advice on the arrangement.  For two weeks they have been telling her to let loose but THIS is the week she was supposed to hold back.  Will I Am tells the audience she will go home.  Nice.  She probably will if only because Will told the audience she would.  I thought she did great and didn't take too many notes because I was enjoying the performance.  I will note, however, that she was one beautiful baby who reminded me of another beautiful baby I know who sings a lot of songs to her mother.  Of course both JLo and Randy give her the kiss of death by telling her she looks beautiful (meaning..you don't look as fat tonight...even though she is not fat she's only not anorexic). 

I'm pretty bored by now so I guess its time to bring on the Jermaine drama.  He didn't seem too upset when they tell him its over or maybe they had ten security men standing just out of camera range. 
I'm not sorry he got caught in his lies. 

Skylar comes on and sings Bonnie Riatt's *Love Sneaking Up on You* which is not a song I'm familiar with.  She does a good performance but because I didn't really love the song, I didn't love her as much as I normally do. 

Thank the Lord and his momma and daddy for Josh LeDet because thus far, apart from Jermaine, this show has been pretty much of a snoozer.  What woman doesn't melt at *When A Man Loves A Woman?* (I bet even lesbians melt at that song).  I tend to agree with JLo that this is the best performance I have seen on American Idol or at least one of the top 4 or 5.  Plus he's such a nice guy!  I even forgive the cheesy taking off his suit jacket because its sort of a retro Motown move.  A great comeback from a so/so performance last week and I hope he gets a lot of votes.  Now...if he can avoid turning into Jacob...I'll look forward to him every week until he gets booted off for the WGWG or Little Miss Perfect. 

Hollie takes on The Power of Love by Celine Dion and I maybe am only imagining this is her answer to Little Miss Perfect who grabbed THE song last week.  Hollie is not to be underestimated.  She looks fragile but I sense she is pretty cool, calculating, and can go for the jugular if pushed.  I like that about her because I think she will use her power for good and not evil!  She did not quite have a *moment* (following Joshua didn't help) but did a great job.

I'm afraid Will I Am may be right and Erika is going home.  I'm sorry because I want to see her sing more.  He Jun should go home..but not likely. 
 

Fugitive