Friday, April 29, 2011
Crystal Bowersox looked gorgeous. Celebrity has done wonders for her. Her song was a little boring, maybe, a little too folksy for my taste. But she is so talented, and so fun to watch.
I think Bruno Mars' Lazy Song is stupid. Although, I woke up this morning singing "today I just don't feel like doing anything", and considered calling in sick to work to watch William and Kate.
I'm obviously hacked off that Jacob is still around. He's like Pukaletta - except less talented and worse dressed - in that he just won't GO AWAY. I honestly don't know who is voting for him, because I'm hard pressed to find anybody on the internet brave enough to post that they like him.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Ryan played games with us and didn't give us a bottom three. My guess is Scotty got the highest number of votes, despite the faux tension Ryan tried to create. I'm glad they called Haley safe first because her very existence is driving the St. Pia fan's insane. Speaking of Haley, I don't think there is any doubt now that she and Casey are an item and I think that is sweet. I liked how he sang the last few notes to her at the end. I also liked the positive way her performed his song. No tears from him!
It was great to see Crystal again but I wish she had sung a better song. I suppose it was appropriate for the setting, though..encouraging the Idols to just sing. I wish Ryan had found the time to talk with her and let her plug her album and appearances.
Bruno Mars was ok but the song lyrics were a little risque for the 7 pm time slot...hand down his pants, birthday suit, and great sex. But who am I kidding? Kids today know way too much.
No word yet on next week's theme but we are going to get another overwrought but boring performance from Jacob.
I liked the Medley and thought Lauren and Haley sounded great together. Also, Scotty proved he can sing something not country, but his detractors won't admit it.
Tomorrow is the Royal Wedding so I'm off to bed.
Best to Worst:
James Durbin for the WIN! Blew the other contestants away. BLEW them AWAY! From the 1st strum on his guitar, I had goosebumps. And they never left until he was done. Randy is right: James will win this whole thing if he keeps this up. Yes, James, I WILL still love you tomorrow!
Haley - Honestly, I think hers would be the only record I'd BUY. She's just so my style - her voice is so interesting, and just so good! I've never heard Beautiful, but I loved the way that Haley did it. I'm glad JLo commented that she had one of the best voices in the competition because Haley deserved some good praise tonight!
Scotty - I had him in the #1 slot until James and Haley performed, because I really liked how he took a little bit of the country out of You've Got a Friend, and just made it smooth. I also think he toned down the sideways microphone and eyebrow waggle, which helped.
Casey - I tell you why I like him: I had a boyfriend once that would take me out to this seedy jazz bar where the bartender had a heavy hand, the room was filled with smoke, and you couldn't even see the other patrons because they were hunkered down in their dark booths listening to incredible jazz. I can't help it - I like the piano, the trumpets, the hat.
Lauren - She's 16. When I was 16, I'd wake up at 4:30am and spend hours primping so I looked perfect for school. I had self-confidence issues, and I didn't have the entire country blogging about the size of my ass. Was her performance stellar? No. Did the judges throw her a bone when her voice cracked to save her from breaking down? Absolutely. But I felt a pang of sadness when I saw her tear up, because she's SIXTEEN and I've been a 16 year old girl.
Jacob - I'm convinced that his stylist goes home and night and tells her husband "you're not going to believe what I convinced this kid to wear today" and then they laugh and laugh. (I'm not even commenting on his singing. I'm done. It's just getting ridiculous here.)
Bottom three should be: Jacob, Lauren, Casey
Bottom three will be: Jacob, Casey, Haley
I worry that Haley might be going home this week. Which would be wrong.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
I know NONE of the words to the ET song, but I've been singing it since last night. At 3:00 am, feeding my 10-week old son, I caught myself humming about aliens and abductions. It's creeping me out that it's just. that. catchy.
The aliens dancing were weird. Katy Perry (who I generally think is gorgeous) looked weird. And Kanye (who I generally think is absolutely nutzo) looked normal. I'm convinced that after the Taylor Swift fiasco, Kanye is forcing restraint on himself, and last night he actually let Katy Perry take over the "I'm nutzo" spotlight. I liked the performance ... I hope my baby son does, too, over and over and over.
And they just don't make AI contestants like David Cook anymore do they? He's just in a league of his own.
Yeah, I have an album out, but let's talk about this charity for a cure for brain cancer and my Mom's dream to meet Stephen Tyler. David Cook, I love you.
Looking forward to next week, although I'm afraid Auntee will need to take the lead as I'm expecting to know very few of the songs.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Ashton, Karen, Naima, Thia, Pia & Paul - Hysterical! The girls are so focused on strutting around in trampy leather outfits that they forget to sing the 1st verse on key. And then the doors open up and Paul comes stumbling out in his token stupid-flower-suit like a drunken monkey.
Pia's belting out her Mariah/Whitney/Celine notes,
Thia's giving the pagent faux-smile,
Naima is "yeah, yeahing" it up,
Ashton's wagging her diva head around, and
Karen's faux-flashing her Latina boobs by opening up her leather vest over and over.
All the while Paul is trying not to flail off the stage.
None of them care that they're not singing *with* each other, or that they're not singing on-key. "So What" was the funniest thing I've seen on Idol in a long time. I spent the entire performance cracking up.
What? They weren't trying to be funny? Oh, then it's just sad.
As for the contestants who really might be rockstars someday, Best to Worst:
James Durbin - What?!? KK likes James Durbin?!? Hell yeah I did. I'd even download that performance, which is saying something since I really am not a "rocker". Drummers were a bit weird, as was the dominatrix wand thing. But the vocals were incredible. Incredible!
Casey - I sort of wished he would've changed up the song a little more ala-David Cook, because he absolutely could have. But I'm a Maroon 5 fan, and I'm a Casey fan. And although I was a little creeped out when he was leaning into JLo, the kiss made me squeal with delight.
Haley - I think she looked absolutely gorgeous, for starters. And she did Adele justice with Rolling In The Deep, for sure. It *is* her niche, and she's found it, and she's good at it. I was annoyed that Randy had to struggle so hard to compliment her, but I'm glad she finally got the praise she deserved.
Scotty - Barely. After the clip of the contestants making fun of the microphone holding, it's ALL I could focus on. Frankly, it annoyed the hell out of me. As did the eyebrow waggle and side-mouth-singing. Swinging was boring. Dare I say "karoke". 'Course, he's not going anywhere.
Lauren Alana - Has really wised up with her song choices and her personality make over. Last week she pandered to St. Pia's and tweens with the Miley ballad, this week she tried to swing the massive country audience back her way. Even though it wasn't the best performance of hers, she's *competing* brilliantly.
Stefano - You're kidding, right? First the clip about him being a flirt and a ladies man had me in hysterics. And watching him strut around the stage like he was in some seedy club strip club trying to get the ladies to shove $1 into his too-tight pants, just put me over the top. I like Closer, it's a sexy song. Stefano was the opposite of sexy tonight bordering on crazy-town.
Jacob - Realized he might be slipping and pulled out the Dead-Father card. Well played. I loved that he screwed up, I loved that he got a bit of negative criticism. Those were the only non-boring parts of the performance.
Botton 3 will be: Haley, Casey, Stefano
Who *should* go home: Jacob (but he won't, because his dad is dead.)
Also, my boyfriend David Cook is coming back tonight and I could not BE more excited. He's the 1st Idol I truly loved. Swoon.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Friday, April 15, 2011
Well done, America. All is right and just again.
Loved Scotty and Lauren again this week. Loved Haley and Casey even more. Didn't love the boys, but didn't expect to.
Auntee is hysterical, by the way. "How ya'll doin' tonight?" Bwahahaha! Awesome.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Best to Worst:
Lauren Alaina - I sort of might start pulling for her to win this thing (Auntee just died.) She sang the climb much better than Miley (which, I agree, isn't saying much), and she's getting SMART. She's pandering to the teens, she sung a ballad to pander to St. Pia's fans, she's even toned down the crazy judge-dancing, Ryan-flirting act and adopted (at least for now) a more mellow, grown-up personality. And she looked really pretty.
Haley - I like Blondie, I like Haley. I honestly don't understand how all three judges gave negative critiques of this. I thought she looked gorgeous (although I was a little worried the camera might show an up-the-dress shot on accident), and she sang/screamed "Call Me" just as well as she sang/screamed "Bennie" and "Come On".
Scotty - He didn't do anything new with the super well-known George Straight song, and it was totally predictable (I typed "predictable", but meant "boring"). I totally didn't get all of this "getting back to his roots" talk because he's sung country every. single. week. Hell, he found a country song during Elton John week! But, again, I was confused last night.
Casey, I guess - I totally didn't get this. I love jazz. I regularly frequented jazz bars when I lived in a city that had them. I love that Casey is an artist, and I really do think he's amazingly talented, but I didn't get Nature Boy and kept thinking of In The Air Tonight like Jimmy suggested. That said, I love his make-over. His hair and beard are shaping up nicely.
Stefano - I have to comment on his clothes because they're getting ridiculous. 1st it was the suit with the tennis shoes, now it's the too-small polo, too-small jeans, and tennis shoes. He could've done Boys 2 Men a real solid and wore a tie and sweater like they do. The. choppiest. version. of. End. Of. The. Road. ever. done. He might not have taken a breath between every word, but. it. seemed. like. it.
James Durbin - I don't get it. Admittedly, I don't like Heavy Metal. I can appreciate a good guitar solo, and am quite good at Guitar Hero, but that's as far as I go. I do like James, though, as a person. And I'd like to see him beat out most of the other contestants for that reason alone.
Paul - Last week I wanted Iggy Pop to flail into a wall or fall off the stage, this week I wanted Paul to flail into a wall or off the stage. The suit thing is getting trite, too. Honestly, I don't even think he's good looking anymore (except he does have the whitest smile ever made.) I've seen Old Time Rock and Roll done better by the drunk at the karaoke bar.
Jacob - The choir was good. And Jimmy reminded America that Jacob was a douche last week. So, that was fun.
Bottom 3 should be: Paul, Jacob, Stefano
Bottom 3 will be: Paul, Haley, Jacob
Random tangent: I believe that the judges are responsible for Pia's departure. And not because they "wasted" the save on Casey. But because they don't ever give negative critiques. Everybody gets the same glowing commentary every week. And without any subliminal guidance, America votes blindly.
What would Simon have said about Paul's flailing? We need a Simon to remind us that they are NOT, in fact, all good all of the time.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
I felt a little sorry for Stefano. They were clearly saying "you suck compared to her, you should be the one leaving"
But I also feel VERY sorry for Pia. It was wrong. And I'm betting the judges wish they would've saved the save for her.
All in all it was a really BAD night:
Constantine Something-or-rather butchered Unchained Melody.
Iggy Pop's scary, shirtless body flailed around the stage for what seemed like forever. I kept waiting for him to fall, or slam into a wall.
Jacob's stylist doesn't understand that overweigh people must NOT wear jeans that are too tight for them because of the muffin-top effect.
And my husband's girlfriend FINALLY wore a top where her boobs looked insane, and she gets voted off.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Tim Halperin's version of When A Man Loves A Woman puts Stefano's to shame:
I hope the tour does well, and that they raise lots of money for Juliana's care.
I've been told I sound grumpy when I post (could it be the 4 hours of sleep at night?), but today is going to be a good day. Why? Because for the 1st time in YEARS of watching AI, I can honestly say that I really do enjoy ALL of the contestants. Last night was just a great show all around, and it's been fun to watch.
That said, somebody has to go. Worst to Best:
Jacob - I'm glad he changed songs because can you IMAGINE what those weird hip-thrusts would've looked like had he been singing Let's Get It On?!? Kris Allen killed Man In The Mirror, and I'll always compare it. It's a low-key song, and Jacob is ANYTHING BUT low key. If for no other reason, he needs to go home for his "if I'm in the bottom three, it's because America is afraid to look in the mirror" comment. WTF?
Paul - I still think he's hot, and quirky. And he might just be a little crazy, just like Johnny Cash was. But he's no Johnny Cash (who is probably rolling over in his grave right now.) For shame.
Stefano - I like his voice and he seems like a genuinely nice guy, but I can NOT get past the Pukaletta curse - Open Your Eyes, Kid!!! The judges said they felt emotion in his performance, but I felt the exact opposite. I actually wondered if he's ever loved a woman, because he was having trouble conveying it if he has.
Lauren - I get that the Jersey Shore poof is "in", but COME ON. Not cute. Natural Woman had some really good notes, but they couldn't make me forget about the 1st 1/2 of the song, which was just ... not good.
Scotty - I still love me some Scotty. But it felt karaoke to me. It felt like a little kid imitating his favorite singer.
Casey - I don't know why everybody is so down on the Growl, because I like it. I think he should Growl an entire song, it'd be awesome. I think the main reason why Casey is fantastic is because, like the judges said, he's a MUSICIAN. And even when he doesn't win AI (because he won't), I hope he goes on to have a career doing what he loves.
Pia - So, you sang up tempo ... give the girl a medal. Was it the earth shattering performance that the judges made it out to be? No. (I was really hoping to see a little more of the Tiny-Turner-Crazy in there - PIA is too straight to pull off that song.) Is she still REALLY. FRICKIN'. GOOD? Absolutely.
James Durbin - If you've been following me, you know I think he's overrated. But tonight's performance was nothing less than AMAZING. It's become a bit of a cliche, but I really did get goose bumps. I didn't even mind the ONE, controlled, scream at the end.
Haley - I've said it before, but my parents were hippies. So, I grew up listening to Janis Joplin and Piece of My Heart is the quintessential Joplin song, in my mind. Haley killed it, which is hard to do. I loved it.
Please, Please can Jacob go home?