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Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Character Study

Tonight the judges are once again in Kansas City to meet contestants culled from Idol's 11 city bus tour.  At least Idol producers have given up on the pretense that the judges see every single contestant audition.  

First up is the obligatory "big" R&B singer that we see every season.  *Big Ron* (or *Big Sexy*) is full of confidence and chest hair and sings entirely to JLo who eggs him on with her impersonation of a sweet and demure Jenny From the Block while Keith and Harry pretend to go out and get some KC barbecue.  Of course he sings *Let's Get it On* and of course he is voted through.  We were, thankfully, spared any more than a glimpse of his aversion to manscaping.

Big Sexy is followed by a theater actor named Ian who sings in falsetto...badly.  Despite demonstrating his range as Harry hits chords, he is rejected.  

We see a montage of contestants all with guitars who make it through.  Hard to say if they are fodder or not. 

Joey Cook takes the stage with her *squeeze box* and sings/talks a campy song about wanting to be called the King of Spain.  She has blue hair and is cute as a button and so so unique because whoever heard of a pop singer with blue hair?  I don't know if she is authentically *unique* or simply imitation *unique* but she may be the finalist we saw the first night from behind in the montage of 24 with multicolored hair.  Or not.  When even I wouldn't mind some purple streaks in my old grey hair it is hard to say  how many of these contestants have developed this *unique* style of haircoloring.  JLo establishes she is 23 which is a good thing because I think JLo's cut off age for giving a flying f-word about female contestants is 23 1/2.  But, she is a *character*. 

Alexis Gomez is a hippie looking country singer who I found rather boring and so did Keith but JLo liked her looks and so, evidently, did Harry as he wasn't that impressed with her voice.  She did have on one of those half skirts favored by Kardashians and Real Housewives cast members so maybe that was what appealed to Harry. 

Now, for my favorite of the night.  Anton from Parsons, Kansas who sang Keith's song *Tonight I'm Gonna Cry*.  I didn't cry but almost did.  He was outstanding.  I hope he can manage the meat grinder of Hollywood because I liked him a lot.  JLo calls him a character too.  I think he is who he is which is a guy from Parsons, Kansas who sings country music very very well. 

As if we haven't already had enough characters on this episode, we are introduced to Stephanie (last name inaudible) who is doing a Minnie Mouse impersonation.  No, she is actually going to sing an original song.  I wasn't moved to tears by the song but she had a nice enough voice and she wasn't all made up and tarty looking.  I think she is 18 so she may have a chance in the long run.

Ashley Stehle fulfills the obligatory sob story component of every audition episode.  Her parents are deaf but her father now has a device that enables him to hear her sing so both parents come into the audition room.  She sings an Alicia Keys song which I maybe would have recognized if she ever sang a note in tune but she did not.  She is only 15 so she can come back next year with a better song.  I can only think of one reason why she was on the episode since there was not a feel good ending and that is to let people know about this new hearing device which I guess is not a bad thing. 

Ellen Peterson played the banjo and it sounded pretty darn good to me.  I loved her yodeling.  

I missed all but the final moments of the final audition because of a phone call.  From what I gather, the contestant is homeless or a vagabond who sleeps in a tarp.  They put him through to Hollywood after much discussion about his image.  He was also a character in JLo's opinion.  I think he smelled too as the last thing I remember hearing about him from the judges was that he was *ripe*.  I don't think Harry meant *ripe* in a good way.

I haven't checked any of the spoiler websites to see who made the top 24.  I'm a little afraid to because I know I will already be disappointed about some.