I wasn't going to watch AI's finale ...
I wasn't going to blog anymore this year ...
But I did, and now I am. Because I'm sad.
It's well established that this was a bummer of a season as a whole. Auntee and I didn't have any clear favorites, or any real nemeses. We tried to hate Shannon Migraine, then Stage-child Jessica, and then Heejun's track pants ... the problem, though, was that so many of these contestants were hateable. Like, ALL of them, at one point or another.
Then the judges and there insipid standing ovations. And the constant praise. Not every performance was good, guys. Most were self indulgent, about 2 were original/creative, and none were worthy of your constant jack-in-the-boxing.
Then the finale. I tuned in because the finales are always star-studded, and even if the top 13 don't float my boat, there will be a star who does.
Let's talk about previous stars that have performed on AI:
Last night ...
Two words: Neil Diamond.
He was, single handedly, THE finale.
The other "stars"
Phil paired with John Fogerty (yawn)
Jessica paired with herself (singing a repeat song)
Joshua and Fantasia (Idol alum) screeched through a song
Girls sang with Chaka Kahn
Boys (mostly DeAndre, unfortunately) sang with Neil Baby
Skylar sang with Reba McEntire
Hollie sang with Jordin Sparks (Idol alum)
Jessica sang with Jennifer Holliday (who?)
JLo does a 37 minute lipsync
Aerosmith does a 39 minute performance (proving they're not feuding after all, except why is Joe Perry so pissed about sharing that mic with Steven Tyler?)
Then then the feather in the cap of an entirely disappointing season:
The white guy with the guitar wins. Again. For the 27th season in a row.