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Thursday, February 3, 2011

Cowboys and Misfits

SO glad KK is back with her subtle take on AI Season 12. I missed the Nashville auditions because I thought AI broadcasted at 8 pm last Thursday and perhaps I missed the best of the audition shows as this week's talent was very sparse.

I didn't take notes when I watched last night and truly could only remember 3 contestants today. The infamous John Wayne Cowboy, the Cowboy with the sister, and the girl from Liverpool who puddled when she realized she screwed up *At Last*. Then they showed a clip of the last contestant last night. The curly haired guy who scatted. I don't remember his name but I would like to see more of him.

Clearly, AI producers flew into LA every joke contestant they came across in every city thus far. I'm not even going to comment on them except for Taneesha who has spent time with artistes (ar tist tuhs).

They only showed 4 people going through. Tim with the crush on JLo, The brothers who sang the duet (and it was good but they have to sing alone in Hollywood); and the MySpace queen Karen Rodriguez who wants to be the first Latina idol (she left me cold);

Thank the heavens that there is only one more audition night to sit through next week and then to Hollywood. I don't know how many people got a golden ticket but I'm guessing 300-400. I don't have a favorite yet, but like KK I have a nemesis and that is the Self-Important Blonde who works for Obama.

The blogging sites say that they have not yet decided the top 20 (or are in the process of doing so right now). Unlike previous years, the contestants went back home from Hollywood not knowing if they made it or not and were to come back in February for the final cut. The only one I am confident will be there is Chris Medina as how could they let that story go to waste? Also...it appears that Thea Madea (Magea) is a ringer which explains why the producers sent her to Milwaukee to audition. She probably didn't stand in line to see Danny Gokey and perhaps didn't even have to pay her own way there...so sadly we will be seeing a lot of her I expect.

I solemnly VOW not to get so crazy about a contestant this year as I was about Crystal Bowersox last year. First, all that obsessive voting took up way to much of my time. Second, it made me far to nice to be an effectively snarky blogger as I was *Crystalized* into sweetness and light.

And, we are all praying that KK's male child will sleep!



Hot Nemesis

I truly do have 600 new, stressful things going on in my life right now. But my AI dedication is SO STRONG, that I can dedicate a few quick seconds to call out my Season 10 Nemesis. That's right, this soon. Even before Hollywood week.

***Disclaimer: You may remember 2 seasons ago when I was super pregnant, which often led to irrationally moody and harsh criticism of just about every. single. person. to appear on AI? For the next couple of weeks (or less, if I can help it) that pregnancy lunacy is back. So, I apologize in advance.***

Season 10 Nemesis: Hot Cowboy with Homophobic Father

"I've never left my ranch", "I love my Mama because she's a breast cancer survivor", "I'm the type of guy your parents want you to bring home", "shucks, aren't I sweet"

1st we meet the homophobic father who tells Ryan Seacrest "if you'd been my son, you wouldn't be the way you are".

What *way* is that? A bajillionaire? A super successful TV and radio host?

Oh, no, you meant "a man's man". Thank God you named your son John Wayne to guarantee he'd grow up to be manly. Because Heaven Forbid you'd have a son named John Wayne who liked to dress up in designer clothes, pay for expensive haircuts, and get spray tans.

(Why, yes, I am about to deliver a son. Anybody want to suggest some names that will make him sleep through the night immediately?)

I've been around the block enough times to pin-point this one from "meet my Homophobic dad, and my meek mother who doesn't speak out of turn, as I swagger into the room": Phony, Fake, Jerk

And, sure enough, I have some ammo:

www.tmz.com/2011/02/03/american-idol-cowboy-john-wayne-schulz-deception-record-label-cd-album/

He's hot though. Damn it.