I didn't lie. I said I probably wasn't going to blog anymore. And I may not last the season. But, despite the mocking from Mr. Auntee, I tuned in this week for auditions in Nashville and Kansas City.
Ryan tells us they are going to reveal the top 24 right away. Yeah right. No, they just show us a group number with everyone in dark shadows. There are men and there are women (although probably it is fair to say that at least 8 of the 12 women are under 18 so technically are not women). One woman has funky colored hair. I didn't take notes, so I've forgotten what song they sang. They sounded good. They were all auto-tuned, I'm sure.
So, the auditions start in Keith's hometown and he shows up in a big ass pickup to pickup JLo and Harry. JLo tries to act all down with it. She is trying to act like she isn't a diva. There is a reason this woman has not won an Oscar to date. Will the live shows continue to feature JLo close ups for 75% of the contestant's performances so that you cannot even tell if you liked the performance or not? Time will tell.
As I didn't take notes I can only say that the 3 hours of programming left me with the clear memory of only three: The Blind Guy (I will learn his name and not call him that in the future if you are all worried about my sensitivity to the disabled). He put a spin on his song (which I cannot remember) that I liked and he had confidence but was not cocky. So, I hope he does well.
The second one I remember is the blonde calling her self Lovey James (its a stage name--her real name is Kirsten which is too hard for people to say). I think she must have sung an Ariana Grande song or something. JLo was all excited because she is young and not jaded yet. Well, if this doesn't work out, with that stage name and her dancing experience she can go straight to the local Bada Bing club and we will see how fresh she is then. I don't like her. I don't like Ariana Grande either.
I have my favorite already. Her name is Jess Lamb. She played the piano--she really played she didn't just hit a few chords melodramatically ala Jena what ever her last name was (oh, that is right--she didn't have a last name she had a stage name too--Jena Irene) who came in second place behind the Meat Loaf impersonator last year. Jess is 28. Which means JLo will trash her to death all season long assuming she makes it far enough. She sang "Ain't No Sunshine" and really slayed it. I didn't even notice whether she changed up the gender in the lyrics. I was mesmerized. Then she asked Harry to jam with her on the piano. It was great.
So, for now, I'm blogging. Not sure how long I will keep it up. We can be happy that Randy is not around this season to take up space and airtime.