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Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Some Guy With Guitar ...

is going to win American Idol this season. I'm not saying the men are better as a group than the women and I'm not saying I'm rooting for some guy with a guitar but its going to happen.  Looking at this top 10 or 15 men, and comparing it to last season, it is pretty darn clear that they culled out any male talent last year in an effort to get a girl winner (just as everyone suspected/knew).  

I have only one guy I really want to see voted into the top 10 or get a wild card and that is CJ Harris.  I just love him.  I love his smile (bad teeth and all) and I love his attitude and I love that he goes against the grain of doing overwrought R&B that every black male has ever done on this show.  If you love R&B and you love runs then you will not agree with me.  I can live just fine with that.

Before I start on the talent, I have to ask:  Who does Randy Jackson have compromising photos of or who is he sleeping with to even get the *mentor* job let alone be promoted so heavily during the broadcast.  Seems like his face was EVERYWHERE tonight.  I am as sick of Randy Randy Randy as Jan Brady was of Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. And I didn't mention Daughtry and Lambert much last night.  Good men.  Adam really does look more handsome without a ton of makeup on but its strange seeing him out of costume so to speak isn't it? 

Speaking of handsome...the men may have an abundance of talent but sadly they have a dearth of good looks. Many are very unfortunate looking. This pains me only because it means that my least favorite is one of the two who is not unfortunate looking and will probably get votes from stupid girls who think he is cute.

First up tonight was Caleb whose style makeover was not apparent to me.  I'm the last person to criticize his excessive girth and at least he knows he should lose a few pounds but does he have to be all sloppy haired too? He believes he is the rocker of the group and he certainly shouts loud enough but all I could think of was James Durbin and how Caleb failed to measure up to him (let alone a REAL rock star).  He sang Stay With Me, a song I and the audience knows well (except I keep thinking that the lyrics are *in the morning I'll just kick you in the head* instead of *kick you out of the door*).  So in addition to James Durbin, all I was thinking about during Caleb's performance was how stupid it was of me not to know the lyrics to Stay With Me.  He actually kind of bores me. 

My man, CJ Harris was next.  I really wish he had followed the mentor's advice and ditched the guitar because I was thinking about whether the guitar was any good instead of listening to the song.  I think he did a fine job even if it wasn't a moment.  And even before Ryan mentioned his root canal, I made a note that he had some work done on his teeth.  Dental work is expensive and he doesn't look like he came from money so I hope either the show paid for it or paid him enough to get the work done.  I think he will get votes.  

The judges tried to explain putting Emmanuel in the top 10 by saying he was a performer.  He seems like a fun guy with a pleasant personality and he isn't unfortunate looking but he does have a fat butt which doesn't look so good swaying around in a semi-twerk.  I thought it was interesting that the coaches said *you won't get a do over* but  JLo gave him just that after his performance was so bad vocally.  I wonder if she fought for him as opposed to Maurice Townsend or someone who can sing, and then felt she needed to prove she wasn't wrong.   I will be surprised if this isn't the last time we see Emmanuel perform.  I don't know what he sang except it was a lot of drama and if my cat had been watching she might have been interested in some of it. 

OK, sweet Sam Wolfe.  He tried so hard to keep from putting his head down and look confident but didn't quite make it.  He is tween candy and might have sailed to the confetti a few years back on his looks alone.  Sadly, tweens don't watch Idol anymore.  Old ladies like me do. But that boy can sing.  Perfect tone, perfect pitch.  I like him and hope he makes it through.   He kind of had that Lauren Bacall look where he had his head down but his eyes came up (You do know how to whistle don't you Steve?).  For those of you too young to remember Lauren Bacall, think of Princess Diana when she wanted to show the press how sweet and sad she was.  If you are too young to remember Princess Diana then I have no idea who you are and why you are reading this blog.

Ok, George Lovett did sail under the radar.  I do not remember him at all.  He sang Grenade and really went drama queen on us.  He said Joshua Ledett was his favorite Idol and that was pretty clear.  Its also pretty clear he is not going to go as far as Joshua Ledett.  The judges were not impressed.  This panel, thanks to Harry's influence I believe, but maybe Keith too, is not impressed by over the top drama.  JLo suddenly doesn't like it either even though she was one of the judges who jumped up in a standing O in prior seasons whenever anyone so much as did one run.  

OK,  here comes This Old Boy, Dexter.  Dexter is not only unfortunate looking he has the name of a character who was a serial killer on TV.  He is good and the song suited him obviously, but I'm with Harry that he is going to have to add something a little more special to be a big name in country music.  He may be able to do that and I suspect he will make it through with the country voters backing him. 

I was so hoping not to hear Alex Preston's name.  He really is all about his instruments and I'm not referring to his voice.  If anyone else had sung that song and was going in his musical direction, I would be rooting for him. He bothered me less tonight than in prior performances but he still makes a snarly fish face on some of his words. Maybe he will make it through. I'm going to lay off of him tonight because I have bigger fish to fry.  I did like Harry's educational contribution about *ending on the 9*.   It almost makes me want to take Music Theory 101.  

Malcolm Allen almost made me cry.  I like him a lot too.  I don't know why they said he didn't feel the song.  I thought he did.  I also liked his expression *cool beans*. A good friend of mine used that expression a lot and it made me think of him.  I'm afraid he is cool beans on toast though with the bad reviews he got from the judges.  

I was surprised that Ben Briley was chosen for the vote off because I thought he was one of the stronger of the guys all along.  Tonight was the first we have heard of his musical heritage (I think).  Tonight was also the first time I saw his eyes.  He wouldn't give up on that stupid hat but at least he put it on backwards (not a look I normally approve of) so we could see them.  I was beginning to think perhaps he had little ferret eyes or something he was so determined to keep them out of sight.  But they are actually quite nice eyes.  I tried to do some research on his mother and grandmother and didn't find anything yet but I did learn that he is a public relations professional and college graduate which is entirely inconsistent with his *shucks I'm from the hills of Tennessee just down the road from Butcher Holler* (which is in Kentucky but you get my point) persona. 

And finally, just as I was about to be all happy pappy and relaxed, they bring out the mean boy Spinny.  HIS name should be Dexter.  This guy will get the teen votes and maybe the frauen votes because he is one of the only guys who is not completely unfortunate looking in the competition and sings pretty well.  Tonight he did not.  Harry won my heart when he said *that was not good*.  It won't matter.  I have no faith that Idol voters will find him as repulsive as I do.  I did notice that when given conflicting advice about whether to play his guitar, he followed Adam's advice.  I think he sang something about love not dying.  My soul was dying watching him.

All in all, I thought tonight's performances were about as rocky as the women's performances were last night. Given the circumstances, we probably shouldn't have expected anything else.  I still don't understand why Savion Wright didn't make the top 31 over that little Fat Albert kid.  I don't understand by Borea and Marielle got in the top 10 over some of the other girls.  I really hoped with the new producer that Idol would get past its obsession with finding the new Justin Bieber or Miley Cyrus by promoting these young kids over talent over 20.   


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