Last night my husband and I decided to embark in a new direction with our careers. Clearly, there's a huge need for our services. And I think every AI contestant would pay top dollar ...
We're going to listen to a contestant rehearse, or just ask them "what song are you planning on singing", and then we're going to say "STOP! Why do you think you can sing that song?"
Jasmine - Love Song. No STOP! Or, if you must, then don't add 16,000 additional notes because you're trying to "jazz" it up.
Matt - Vida la Viva. No STOP! You can't be Chris Martin, ever, sorry.
Jeanine - This Love. No STOP! You do realize you're a beautiful black woman with a strong voice and not a skinny white punk kid, right?
Kris - Man in the Mirror. Hahahaha oh, that wasn't a joke?
Matt - If You Could Only See. Yes, Matt, I love that song too ZzzzzzzZzzzzzzz oh, sorry, were you singing? I fell asleep.
Is there NOBODY available to STOP these contestants from picking songs that are CLEARLY wrong? I do like ALL of these songs, but just because it's a good song, doesn't mean YOU can sing it.
I liked NONE of the guys. NONE.
I get that Adam is pre-picked to win this whole damn show, but I hated his Mick Jagger impression.
I like TWO of the girls:
Meaghan with the sleeve. Randy pinned it exactly when he compared her to Duffy, who I love, and whose CD I bought - again, that's how I decide if a contestant is good.
And Allison. Ever since I choreographed a dance to Alone in the 2nd grade, video taped it, and sent it to my Grandma and Grandpa ... I appreciate any woman who can do that song justice. I cringed when I heard she was singing it (I'd just repressed the memory of Ramiele Maluby butchering it) ... but she blew everyone else out of the water. I'm pulling for her.