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Tuesday, March 30, 2010

You Heard It Here First!

Two weeks, after I dub Tim Urban, Tim Teflon Urban, the rest of America wakes up and copies me! I should have trademarked the term! Tim doesn't even understand that it means that no matter how awful he is he keeps going through...he thinks it has something to do with him not letting the judges critiques get him down. I'm afraid he is not the brightest bulb on the tree. More about Tim later.

Usher...I had never heard of him (I'm not a big R&B fan) but I do recall seeing him in one of my guilty tabloids involved in a divorce or something. I'll have to google him. He took his mentoring seriously, which was nice and it was good they had someone over 21 to mentor them this week. One good thing about American Idol is that I am learning about new people and new things all the time. For example, do you know what *autotune * is ? I just found out. It some sort of computer program that smooths out the pitch so it makes people sound on tune if they are not. Evidently it is used all the time primarily in the recording studio. This explains why some people sound good on recordings but terrible when they sing live and why so many people like to lip sync rather than perform live. I don't completely understand how it works, despite several people on the Idol board trying to explain it to me...they just used all sorts of computer terms....anyway...its a cheat that is used very commonly and probably by the Idols when they do their studio versions of the songs. If they are using it live then just think how bad Tim Urban must really sound!

On to the critiques...best to worst.

Crystal is still my heroine. The song suited her perfectly (her official fan group wanted her to sing it) and she showed that she can hit some good high notes too without a scream and on pitch! I agree with Simon about the backup singers...they were distracting. Why is it all of her performances seem about 1/2 as long as the rest of them? I just don't want them to end. I thought her high heels were cute but I agree with Simon...don't get caught up in all the wardrobe/personality stuff. Just sing! On the other hand, if she wants to try something new and isn't just doing it because of complaints that she is *always the same*..then go for it.

Lee DeWyze might have had a moment tonight. I was thinking...I'm pretty sure he's going to get the girl no matter if the other guy treats her like a lady or not. How can he not know how good he is?

I'll put Casey and BM side by side. I still don't like BM. But this was his newfound genre (along with his newfound guitar...hmmm...why do I find his love for the guitar a bit phony/baloney...I think he's trying to catch the Crystal/Lee/Casey train). Casey was fine but I'm thinking if he wasn't so picture perfect cute he would be critiqued much more harshly.

What did Sioban do to piss off the judges? I didn't think her song was so bad although I admit her lower register beginning was not that impressive. She really had the most difficult song to do and I thought the judges were unduly harsh on her. Ok, I'm a bit bored of the screaming and her fans on the Idol Website are as obnoxious as Adam Lambert's fans were last year...but I wrote in my notes....*You are NOT going to be the worst performer of the night*.

I was really hoping Andrew would not suck tonight and he didnt. I'm liking him more personally. He will never impress me enough to vote for him but I'm glad he got good reviews tonight and I hope it improves his confidence. I loved him telling his mama to calm down! It was in a sweet way. I liked his mother wearing that zebra top too.

The toddlers....Katie and Aaron. WHY don't they give them the criticism they deserve? Katie's taking on Aretha was arrogance of the highest order. She stayed on key but boy it was a stupid rendition... CHAY IN CHAY IN CHAY IN of fools. And then the stupid discussion about *what kind of artist* she is supposed to be. She is supposed to be home starring in her high school musical, Brigadoon, you idiot judges. And Aaron taking on Ain't No Sunshine after Kris Allen did it so perfectly last year. You know, you know, you know, you know...Aaron? I know a certain blogger who will have no sunshine watching idol UNTIL you are gone!

Tim Teflon Urban does a cheesy version of Sweet Love. He hit one or two notes which I think shows he has some sort of voice but he is just cheese on a stick. Someone need to take some strong steel wool to that teflon and he needs to go home.

But NOTHING was as bad as Didi BeSorryForMe and *What Becomes of the Brokenhearted*. Oh man...she sounded like barfly at your local Karaoke bar after 15 tequila shots. Her voice does have some lyrical qualities but she didn't use them tonight. There was no redeeming quality in that song. And that stupid dramatic *Tell me...Tell me* at the end was like the flies on the cowpatty! (I was going to say maggots on spoiled meat but thought that was too sickening). And I'm pretty sick of her emoting all over the place. Did they show a backstage scene with her?

I liked the backstage scenes! I hope they keep doing that.

If I left anyone out it was because they were even worse than Didi.

The three who should be in the bottom 3 tomorrow night? Tim, Didi, and Aaron. I have no idea who will actually be there.

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