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Friday, March 11, 2011


First, I need to apologize for my non-existent postings. In the interest of full-disclosure: I have a 16 month old daughter and a 1 month old son (an endeavor that I don't recommend for anybody). If I get 5 seconds to myself, I normally take a shower instead of get online. I do hope to be a more regular contributor from here on out.

I am thrilled beyond belief that "Miss Thong" is gone. I can remember one performance (group day) that I liked. Every other performance of hers I've wanted to scream "are the judges listening to something else entirely?" The only good thing about her was the Fro, which was fantastic.

Here's the order in which I'd send the rest of the contestants home:

Steffano - Stevie Wonder + dance remix. Enough said.

Karen "I'm Latina" Rodriguez - We get it, you're Latina. We get it, you speak spanish. Next.

Lauren Alaina - While I don't share Auntee's hatred for her, she can only float on Steven Tyler's lust for so long.

Thia - While her voice is okay, she bores me.

Naima - I'd like to hang out with her, but mainstream America won't "get" her.

Jacob Lusk - He does have his fantastic moments, but he's TOO much. I would've liked him so much better if he would've done R Kelly's Trapped in the Closet.

Lambert 2.0 - Been done before.

Hailey - I fear that her ability to sing a broad spectrum of songs will ultimately kill her, which is weird because other contestants get praised for that.

Hottie Paul - My husband would be so mad that I put Paul this high on the list, because he's a fan. But he's too quirky to make it to the end.

Casey - I was totally on the Casey-to-win train until somebody pointed out a resemblance to Taylor Hicks (which I refuse to agree with at this point.)

Pia - Blows my mind that Auntee considers her a screamer, because I think she's amazing.

Scotty McCreery - AI producers should ride this teenage money train all the way to the bank. I'm surprised he's not already at home rolling around in his piles of cash. There was a time when I'd make dirty sexual comments about Scotty, but now that I have a son of my own, I fear I would just sound like a dirty old lady. So instead I'll say that I'd like to adopt little Scotty as my own son so that I could pinch his cheeks and watch my husband play catch with him in the back yard. I love me some Scotty (And I hate country music.)

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